An alternative system of values subscribed to by several noted villain
s, near-villains, or anti-heroes
that actively shuns objects, feelings, sensations, etc. commonly regarded by society
as positive, such as...
Candy canes, flowers, ice cream sundaes with hot fudge, stories involving fairies and princesses and shining knights on white horses, butterflies, piles of soft goose feathers, greeting cards, spacious homes in the country, truth, honesty, valor, good hygiene, and Los Angeles
...and offers in their stead...
Rotten apples, weeds, ice cubes coated with motor oil, stories involving Godzilla stomping Bambi, big ugly moths, mounds of smelly garbage, a pile of “get well” worms, cramped and dingy garbage cans, lies, trickery, cowardice, questionable cleanliness, and NYC.
The origin of this intriguing philosophy is deeply rooted in Grouch Culture, whose leading thinker is currently Oscar the Grouch. The origins and the homeland of the grouches is unknown, the sole remnants of their kind currently living along a single street of New York City. While most adherents of Grouch Logic are grouches, it has begun to make inroads into the villain community. Chief non-grouch subscribers to Grouch Logic are noted villains Boris Badenov and the Grinch.