Classic bumper sticker often seen on custom vans in the '70's and early '80's

More often than not accompanied by "If this van's a' rockin', don't come a' knockin'."

Once upon a time there was a space hippie who lived in an intergalactic VW bug. It was a small ship but he had plenty of room to take his half-wolf dog Zion along and give a ride to the occasional hitchhiker thumbing his way across the galaxy. One day Ganz (as he called himself) was driving as he normally did across the Orion arm of the galaxy when he came upon an individual on the side of the road. Being the brotherly type, Ganz pulled over to give the young lady a ride. She was a slim girl with nappy-assed dreads that just drove Ganz crazy. She smelled slightly of body odor and patchouli and it was all Ganz could do to keep from drooling. Zion took to her immediately and proceeded to do just what Ganz was fighting not to do. Zion had very active saliva glands. The young lady didn't mind however, and even managed to keep the stupid mutt in hand as they pulled away from the side of the stellar byway.

"Gas, Ass, or Grass" Ganz quipped, only half seriously, "Nobody rides for free."

"I think one or more of those can be arranged," beamed the girl. "I might dress real shitty, but I'm actually quite well off."

Ganz was quite taken by the strange girl's presence and belatedly remembered that he had yet to introduce himself. "The name's Ganz, and my salivetic compadre here is known as Zion. We are on our way to Stratishama City, on Garlastric IX. Makin' our way to Woodstock 3000… gonna be some phatty shit goin' down."

The girl smiled again and blinked her big hazel eyes in an almost seductive manner. "Looks like you're going my way brother," She purred, "It appears that I finally have some good karma comin' my way. They call me Starshine."

The conversation died down at this point and they continued down the byway with only the pneumonic growl of the VW's elderly engine to break the silence of the interstellar spaces. Ganz, although generally content to remain in the company of Zion alone, reveled in Starshine's aura.

Unfortunately this burgeoning embryonic romance was cut short by a nearby supernovaeing star and they all died.

The end.


It is so hard not to put a disclaimer on this...

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