Found a Peanut

Like "The Song That Never Ends" and "99 Bottles of Beer on the Wall," "Found a Peanut" is a perfect song to belt out on any long car trip when you suddenly get the urge to drive your companions bonkers. The beauty of the song is that you can put almost any past-tense phrases of two to four syllables with even vaguely correct meter in place of the standard verses -- thus you have instant near-infinite variations.

The song's sung to the tune of "My Darling Clementine," and the structure is thus: (I'll use {v} for the verse phrases.)

{v},{v}, {v} last night,
Last night (I) {v},{v} last night.

According to my rough memory, the most common things to put in place of {v} in the most common order are:

1. Found a peanut
2. It was rotten (no "I" in this verse - just stretch out the night a little!)
3. Ate it anyway (I)
4. Got sick (I)
5. Called the doctor
6. Died Anyway
7. Went to heaven
8. Played a harp
9. Broke a string
10.Went to hell
11.Woke up

If I may, I would like to submit my version.

1. Found a peanut
2. Had some mold
3. Ate it anyway
4. Choked and died
5. Went to Heaven
6. Saw the shiny throne
7. Where was God
8. He ate the Peanut
9. He choked and died
10. He went to Hell
11. Followed him down there
12. Saw the grisly throne
13. Where was Satan
14. He ate the peanut
15. He choked and died
16. Went to heaven
17. Followed him up there
18. Found the peanut
19. Fed it to a bear
20. He choked and died
21. He went to Kansas