Great news - the job interview went well. Nobody was at the front desk when I arrived, the woman who greeted me informed me that she thought my interview was at 11:30 which made me a little nervous, but I figured better to arrive way early than to be a couple of minutes late. I felt like the women who interviewed me were very honest about the job requirements. I was asked how I would handle a personality conflict, that coupled with the body language made me suspect that this is either a current issue, an ongoing one, or something they've had problems with in the past, but I'm glad they raised the tough question and hopefully I handled it in a manner that conveyed I wouldn't be involved in interpersonal conflict the way that I have been in the past. I woke up at four after staying up too late so it was a bit of a struggle to go about my day. I was told I would hear back by the end of this week or early next week, I think it's a good sign that I was called in for a face to face interview while they're still conducting phone interviews. I knew there would be competition, but all I can do is show up, present myself to the best of my ability, and trust that they are equipped to recognize which candidate will be the best fit for their organization at this point in time. If I get it, that would be nice, if I don't, back to the drawing board.

Since I was awake so early I applied for more jobs. One of them had this stupid 100 question quiz that was designed to test basic math, English, and integrity. I think these kinds of things are lame, especially when they pose always and never questions. It would be a lie to say that I've never lied about anything. I don't expect to hear back from that company, and I don't want to work there even if I do. The trouble with all of these jobs is they blur together after a while. I can't remember who is sales, who is customer service, or who is something else like patient coordinator or other fill in the blank title for job that I think I could do. My 'friend' at ZipRecruiter sent me a job for a pharmacist opening and I wanted to fire back something snide, but stopped myself just in time. Related - I would love a job where I make $90/hour, however, I can't exactly whip up a pharmacy degree and subsequent training in my apartment. I'm still nervous and scared. It will be a lot of driving if I get this job, but I will be making more money and have the income to replace or upgrade my vehicle if something happens to it. My self esteem book speaks about people approaching life from a - what will go wrong next mentality - rather than a - many good things are happening to me on a daily basis, and sometimes there are setbacks, but I am strong, resourceful, etc..., and I can cope.

Feels like there's a lot more left to write, but I can't concentrate which tells me I need to log off and do something different. At the library, maybe some light reading will be a welcome change of pace.

Much love,

J

P.S. I am really proud of myself for getting my act together in small and meaningful ways. Also, would pay large sums of money if someone would stop, pick me up, drive me home, serve me a delicious meal, and tuck me into bed tonight where I could sleep until I was no longer mentally drained...

j

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