October 4, 2000
Everything Editor Logs
history | prophecy

I am posting this a bit early because I have to get on a plane in a little while. I have the feeling that other "gods" and editors might wait for me to post as it seems to have become a small tradition for me to ramble on incoherently about what's really going on here behind the simulacrum. So that their sense of courtesy does not cause them any inconvenience, here it is.

Before the rambling, perhaps a few responses to messages that have been vibrating through the nodegel:

Q. Does dem bones really consume as many drugs as I think he does?
Editor's Note: YES
A. I don't know. How many drugs do you think he consumes?

Q. Lots. Scads. Tons.
A. Well, you might be right. As for me, I can honestly say that I have never actually seen bones take any drugs at all. In fact, I had a cold recently and he recommended some kind of American natural remedy of Mountain Dew and Oreos (which I was too cowardly to follow).

Q. What do you think of GTKY nodes?
A. Well, many people like them but I don't care for them so much.

Q. You're evading the issue.
A. Pardon me? I am? Well, what is the issue?

Q. The issue is that you're nuking them.
A. Actually, no I am not. However some gods and editors have been pruning what they feel to be useless content. I would rather that people node things that they are really interested in and that they wish to present in such a way that others are interested as well. But some of the GTKY nodes are very popular. People like them. I am worried more about how users sometimes dump their votes on them instead of using them responsibly to help guide the nodeflow.

Editor's Note: Often, with GTKY nodes the problem isn't so much the content of the writeups but where the content was placed. For example: the (now deceased) GTKYN "Where do you live?" had writeups that should have been placed individually under the user's home town node. So, if you live in Chicago, IL you could post some interesting info under that node--as opposed to adding to dozens of other writeups in a GTKY node.

Q. What's a GTKY node?
A. A "getting to know you node".

Q. Oh. Thanks, dude.
A. You're very welcome.

Q. So then the gods and editors don't agree on everything?
A. No, I should think not. After all, I like umeboshi which are wizened, reddish, salty pickled plums. I don't think most others would care much for them?

Editor's Note: Sensei is correct: I, like most other sane drug users, feel that this "umeboshi" is most definitely gross-out stuff.

Q. But what about the implants?
A. Well, yes, of course, there is the issue of the implants.

Q. So then do you guys get into big fights about nuking stuff?
A. Not that I know of. I think that we all trust each other and have mutual respect for each other's choices. We are all people deeply committed to the database, the projext, and the users of E2. We do often consult with each other. However there is no "top-down" decision making.

Q. Not even a little bit? I'd like to see moJoe take wharfinger.
A. Sorry, no.

Q. What's a node?
A. Welcome. You might want to read Everything FAQ. Take your time. Read around. Do a few searches. I hope you have fun here.

Well, that's probably enough for now. On to the ramblings:

O dem bones, the freegel steams in anticipation of the shapes into which it will be noded. Barely sentient, it can barely contain its excitement. It wishes to take on content, to convey. It wishes to be noded.

The nodegel swells and heaves with the passage of new nodes into New Writeups.

The cilia of your minions are also waving in excitation, their eye stalks swivel to greet each new node and writeup.

The gel is good.

Killed I just shit the biggest damn shit I ever shat by the never-logged-in BoinkZap. Boink and Zap it is.

Also Boinked and Zapped:

  • repeated kicks to the nuts
  • This node is intoxicated
  • the shits
Do I detect certain fixation here?

Killed How "correct" is British English? by Lith. It was blank. Sorry, that ain't "correct".

Killed: Anonymous' writeup in Water tower. Total Content: "Water towers are large structures, generally urban and metal. They make excellent sniping spots." There were no links. Informed the user in the catbox that it needed work. Checked back about 12 hours later. No improvements. No mercy.

Killed: herbapet's writeup in automatic bazooty. 'Twas gibberish. Mighta been song lyrics, but ya sure couldn't tell from the writeup. Zapped the nodeshell, too.

Killed: herbapet's writeup in naked twister. Really dumb, especially compared to decent writeups already there. Claimed to have invented the game, which seems unlikely.

Killed: herbapet's writeup in twep. It was blank.

Killed: herbapet's writeup in onomatopoeia. Total Content: "another word that is an onomatopoeia is foop". And another one is THWACKOOOM!

herbapet's writeup in Vincent Price. NFN. Tried to say what the other writeups had said, but still got it damn wrong.

Zapped Nodeshells: anti wharfinger and mat catastrophe nodeshells created through the everyone account.

Glared angrily at: a bunch of herbapet's other writeups. Betcha a quarter he's huffing.

Glared irritatedly at: the recreation of E2 User Rights. It seems terse wants to resurrect holloway's "Kill All Editors" and "No Nukes for Anything Ever" campaigns. Betcha a nickel he'll be pulling an Asamoth before November...

Deleted Users: all of the ones listed in Lord Brawl's writeup above.

Zapped: anti-dannye nodeshell created throught the everyone account.

Killed: nisroc's writeup in General. Total Content: "George C. Scott's memorable hawk from the 1964 Kubrick classic, Dr. Strangelove." (deep breath) THE GUY'S TITLE IS NOT HIS FREAKIN' NAME! DIE DIE DIE! (pant pant pant)

Glared at: numerous writeups by SkogDooM. If there's not some improvement in a few hours, I'll kill 'em.
First day of editing, and I didn't kill everything.

Cooled C!hristmas by AlexZandar. Good original content. Good original content makes baby Jesus happy.

Cooled On being the Older Woman by Trina. Very good writing, very promising noder.

Cooled Creole/Cajun Cuisine Metanode by Evil Catullus. Factual, content rich nodes like this are often overlooked.

Swept under the rug:
  • What's the best T-shirt slogan you've ever seen? by gkAndy. Consisted of "I once saw a photo of a biker going down a road, with the slogan on his T-shirt reading : "If you can read this, the bitch fell off" This has to be a candidate :)" Too bad that was already listed by Lith in the second writeup. I suggest paying very close attention to jessicapierce's not-so-subtle hint in the first writeup in that node.

  • How did you choose your Everything username? by everyone. Writeup consisted of several pages of blank space and "none of yous bitchuz took it yet, to I owns it now. Byeach." Stop wasting time and space. No one thinks it's funny, and things like that will piss off the management enough to remove the account.

  • Sub7 by splitrocket. No links, "six maybe? just thought I'd throw that out there." Just thought I'd throw it to the wolves.
Regarding dem bones' use of drugs: HELL YES HE DOES. I can attest to that. Remember in Half Baked when Bob Saget yelled "I used to suck dick for coke! That's an addiction man!"? Based off of bones.

I break for little furry things and all, but there some things that run out in front of my car and I swerve to hit 'em . . .

  • sic by herbapet: "When interviewing, the interviewee will sometimes slip into slang or pronounce words with an accent. This is where sic comes in. Sic is actually an acronym for: Spelling is correct." The derivation is wrong, and the definition is unclear if you don't know what it means already. I asked the user to get it nuked yesterday, and he said he would. You think I won't come back to check? Other writeups in the node give correct information.

  • klipper by klipper (fled): "LOOKING FOR WHITE GIRL TO BE MY GURL FRIEND! I HAVE A PIC!!! E-MAIL ME AT Klipper474@aol.com!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Chicks dig exclamation points.

    klipper was here for a grand total of eleven minutes on July 17, 2000.

Users with No Writeups: klipper

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