Stormy weather. I couldn't sleep. She
and I got into an argument, and it left me tense. Too tired to put it behind me, I waited next to her for sleep as she somehow with out moving shifted the blankets lenthwise, so that my feet poked out right next to the window
. I breathed, prayed, sighed a ton, but her words, her tone, echoed and echoed in my head.
I drifted out around six...
We were in a compound. A Sears and True Value Hardware store and church foyer all in one, sprawled out through many departments and mezzanine floors. We were wandering around there for a while, past the used bride's maid dresses and the odd display of Led Zepplin Action Figure Chess Sets and remote control cars.
We snuck into a closet, and made love. Delicious. Looked down and watched myself penetrate her. When I looked up her eyes were wide and smiling.
Then we went to the church foyer and sat down at a lopsided table and drank coffee and chatted. A man approach her, asking for a cigarette. She rolled one for him, leaving the flap for him to lick. He moved close to her, touched her.
"I hope you enjoyed that," she said to him, "Cause it just made me feel cheap."
The man told her he enjoyed it fine. She became angry. I stood.
"Well, well, you want to take me then?" he asked me, raising his fists like an irish boxer. They looked tremendous. I knew he could kill me with one blow.
I felt drunk, buffered. Not nervous, which surprized me. I should be shaking right now, but I'm not. I look him in the eye and say.
"No. I don't want to take you. I want you to leave the girl alone."
He dropped his fists, shot a glance at his lackey, and they took off. G and I went outside to smoke our smokes. I asked her why she attracted that sort of crowd. She crouched down and began telling me why she hates men. I saw the two guys comming by-- the jerk-off and his squire-- and we moved out of their line of sight.
And in the dream I had a dream we were making love, and when I woke up in the dream I told her how relaxed I felt now, now that that was out of me. We continued talking and went back inside.
She told me about her dream:
"We're walking through the forest, next to a stream. Across the stream is a field full of the rubble of plane crashes. There is this huge plane crash right in the side of the mountain, and its parts are scattered everywhere and they are falling into the river. Somebody has stuck a whole bunch of American flags in the side of the mountain..."
I rolled over. And over. And stumbled out of bed at seven fifteen, trying to tell her something, trying to understand why we had to go through that argument last night, rubbing her shoulders before I left for work.
She didn't respond when I said good bye.