It was a cold, dark early morning as I stepped out into my back garden. The lawn was a dark brown, just mud which had been trodden into dips and mounds but was now frozen, covered in frost. I trod on the lawn, feeling the frozen ground give way slightly underfoot, and walked to the bottom of the garden, the hard ground crunching softly. This was fun. I walked slowly back to the top, then turned around and went to the centre of the lawn. I slowly leaned forward, as if falling in slow motion, until I lay face-down on the lawn. I relaxed, freeing my mind from the white noise of incessant thought. It was like my computer - it was just as if I had shut down Windows into DOS. I looked up and saw that the lawn was now covered in raw, pink prawns. This wasn't enough, I had to totally let go of my mind, to take the final step and get rid of DOS. I let myself go and enveloped nothing.

I awoke to a sickening stench, and looked up to see the lawn was vivid and putrid in the puke of maggots. I still lay in the garish mess, and as I looked slowly around I saw a man in the corner. It was just a man, any man, no man. The man was me. I suddenly awoke into the real world.

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