Oh holy shit
. I'm back at high school
, surrounded by violent
ic technophobes. But something isn't right. The sun
is shining. Isn't it strange that in all my memories of high school, I can't remember a single sunny day?
I'm walking in the schoolyard. I'm too hot, so I take my shirt off. The ground under my feet has been baked into a firm mass of cracked earth, and the grass has turned yellow due to the lack of rain.
I hear a noise, and before I can register the sound something strikes out and digs a pair of sharp fangs into the flesh behind my knee. A rattlesnake.
The strange thing is, I feel it. I can physically feel the pain as the snake's fangs sink into my leg.
This is insane. There are no rattlesnakes in Scotland. If I was a Catholic, I think, I could pray to Saint Patrick. But that's no good. He was Irish. Like an Irish Santa Claus hired by Guiness.
My musings are interrupted as a second snake attacks, biting my ankle. I feel agony as its teeth scrape the bone. I sink to the ground, screaming. The world around me fades to black.
When I wake up, I don't realise that it was a dream. Am I in a hospital ward? Am I dead?