I dreamt that I was sitting on the edge of a large and deep
swimming pool. Nearby, former president
George W. Bush was giving a
press conference.
"As you all know," he was telling the gathered press corp, in his familiar twang, "ever since I left the presidency, I have been relentless in pursuing my
dream of creating a self-aerating
underwater breathing suit. Well, today, thanks to the George W. Bush Foundation, that goal has been reached."
Reporters raised their hands with questions, but one, a tall, stern looking man in a light brown suit, went out of turn. "Mr. President, I am with the Right-to-Life Foundation. We are displeased that you head up a foundation which provides a health care plan to its employees that includes
abortion coverage."
Bush was clearly none too pleased with that question being asked. "Sir, that's not what we're here to talk about today. Now, I'll be glad to have somebody from our press office contact you, but I think we'd better get to the
demonstration."
Without another word, Bush walked to the edge of the pool and, still fully dressed, jumped into the water. The Right-to-Life questioner stood at the edge of the pool, arms folded, glaring down at the former president. Bush, swimming toward the bottom, turned back for a moment to glare up through the water at his accuser, disapprovingly, and then continued swimming down towards what seemed to be a flattened-out diving apparatus at the bottom of the pool.
Bush settled his feet into the shoes of the diving apparatus, and the rest of it automatically began folding itself around him, encasing him, until at last the dome-like top came down over his head and shoulders. He turned to look up towards us. The dome was filled with water, but suddenly some mechanism in the suit began turning the water into air -- breathable air. Bush stood there, on the bottom of the pool, several feet of water over his head, breathing in a suit which needed no oxygen tanks, no line to the surface.
I was so excited by this that I started running around the pool, and after a few yards I cut sharply towards it and leapt in, doing a huge
cannonball. As soon as I hit the water I realized that I was still carrying my bag, with my camera and other things in it that could be ruined by the water. I quickly swam to the other side and tossed the bag over the edge of the pool, but as I did my driver's license fell out, wafting lazily towards the bottom. I swam down to get it, and some other article of fabric, perhaps a
bandanna, which had fallen as well. But once I got to the bottom, I discovered that I could only swim sideways, not up towards the surface. I couldn't breathe, and was surely going to drown.
Just then I saw Bush, in his self-aerating diving apparatus coming towards me--to rescue me? I don't know, because (in my dream) I passed out; and in real life, I awoke with a gasp.