Derwood, 20855

A tiny, quaint little suburban town in Maryland about 30 minutes north of DC

Points of interest:

• The 7-11 where the nice asian lady can spot you a quarter if you are short
• Magruder High School, where one is surrounded by corn fields, and cursed with at least one student death a year.
• The abandoned house in the cornfields where far too many people are rumored to have sex and the meaningless graffitti flows like wine at a wedding.
• The Redmill shopping center, home of the joys of McDonalds, the blissful taste of Blimpie sandwiches, and the poor nameless video game store.
• The 99.1 HFStival, where crappy bands play, ugly girls flaunt themselves, and horny boys love every second of it
• Shady Grove Road. What? You don't know where Shady Grove Road is? Foreigner...
• The Metro, where High School kids meet to go on field trips and the working class adults pretend they're important.

• Obsess over college
• Drink alchohol at a young age
• Have an above-average number of druggies
• Have "parties" that consist of sitting and watching movies
• Are pathetic

  And so, the world is introduced to the mind-numbing land called Derwood -- where the children are born into mediocrity, grow into quirky people, and end up living in a nearby Derwood-ish land where they can spend the rest of their lives being average. But hey, at least the subs are good.