by Don Webb
This has no Copyright, and may be reposted at will
We have long awaited the moment to release our manifesto, so that we would
not appear guilty of the sin of vanguardism. Since Bart Nagle has noted that
book publishers now note books bearing the suffix "Cyber" in the
title passe, we realize that it is time to strike while the iron is cooling.
The Cyberpasse movement began on October 8, 1966 when the BBC aired <I>The
Tenth Planet</I> -- part of their popular Dr. Who% series. The Cybermen
have replaced their natural bodies with plastic and thus have become disease
free and nearly immortal. They represent the ideal of the Cyberpasse movement.
Cyberpasse will overtake cyberpunk, because we created it as a front. The
movement has great wealth and power, and is an open conspiracy. Any number may
play, provided that they obey the Cyberlaws. We are the rulers of the world, the
makers of the zeitgeist, and the oatmeal of reality.
These are the Cyberlaws, the key to Cyberpasse:
1. You must own a computer. It must be a boring computer with lots of
capacity for upward and downward networking. You favorite phrase is "The
computer is a tool." You must pretend incompetence with your computer, so
that people explain things for you, and do things for you. Thus you learn to tap
the skills of lots of experts.
2. You must belong to a frequent flyer plan. You'll travel a lot to see
other Cybermen. You must own a futon to put up traveling Cybermen. You
must make your visitors look as boring as possible, so as not to tip off your
neighbors that you are a planetary ruler.
3. You must appear dull. This is essential. Everyone must view you as a
harmless amateur. You must practice perfect manners, so you don't get thrown
out of places for being too dull.
4. You must foster a myth of a long-term illness. Thusly you can call in
sick for work, whenever a learning opportunity presents itself. Knowledge is
5. You must place yourself in the middle of various webs of information.
Always share information, but always filter to extend the Cybervalues of
logic, and of slow and steady change. You must deny that you are trying to
improve the world, as always appear to be a shambling slow witted machine that
just happens to pass along the correct information at one time. Remember humans
are hostile to change agents.
6. You must make sure that they're a lot of cutting edge movements around to
draw fire. As a long term way to secure this, be sure and strongly support civil
7. You must always deny the importance of new information technologies.
This is not to stifle, but to make people think they are harmless. Always argue
that there is nothing new going on. This will make people, less likely to
fear/resist certain changes.
8. You must act every day to bring about the change into a cybersociety.
Each act must may be downplayed, but it must be constant and quiet. Accumulate
power to make your actions a little stronger. Afterall the boss can OK the T1
phone lines for the business, and she can allow personal Email accounts.
Always have a boring explanation, economy, efficiency, whatever. But be sure
you never allow a step backward.
9. You must deny there is an organized Cyberpasse movement. Even to your
10. You must seek allies in all areas of society.
11. You must never act in anger, but only with logic and harmonious feelings.
Our battles are not the day to day battles of the news. Our battle is that of
the vegetable empire vast and slow.