Half Man, Half Biscuit song from their
1985-
1986 album
ACD. The lyrics are a
pastiche of
George Orwell's
Animal Farm. As is customary with
Half Man, Half Biscuit, there are references galore to
obscure Z-list
celebrities. The song takes a
humorous and
irreverent look at
politics. It was written during the
Cold War, remember.
Arthur Askey and Sir Douglas Bader went down to the Animal Farm
Dougie bored a boar with his stories from the war
And explained about the boil on his palm.
Napoleon very pink offered both of them a drink
And a drink and a drink and a drink
Come the hour of four they were legless to be sure
And not one of them had even had a wink
Of sleep
And everybody sang as loud as they could,
Four legs bad - two legs good.
This made the boys feel pretty oppressed.
Came the new realm, it was A.A. at the helm
While Dougers played 'Luftwaffe' on the roofs,
After amputating limbs all the others wrote new hymns
And a signpost read 'Second hand hooves'.
Years passed by, double grazing in the sky.
It was good but it was total apathy,
Everybody arsed around and that 'Beasts of England'
Sound had been ruined by a busy busy bee.
And chants were heard from the East to the West,
Four legs good - no legs best,
Invalidity reigned supreme,
One time visitors were now the regime.