"Another one. Another year gone. Completely. I am not so sure that it matters, really."
As I drove home this evening (absolutely sober) Regina asked me, "So what were you doing last year?" And I am not positive as to whether it was a joke in the form of a question or not. Either way, it did not matter. The answer was simply, "The same thing I am doing now."
This evening consisted of getting to the party at eleven. Watching the boys play darts for dollar bills. Vinny told me to have a VO and coke, and I did hesitate, but it is VO. I also knew that I was not going home anytime soon. For hours and hours, I was sure. I went upstairs and got one of those famous red plastic cups and filled it with ice. Regina poured a shot into a shotglass and dumped it in, added the coke, and I was set for the evening. I sipped the drink occasionally, watching people come in the front door, waiting. Waiting for that feeling of excitement. Waiting for Dick Clark to come on the television, in front of a huge crowd of freezing people, and countdown. We all had hats and noisemakers and glasses of champagne by the time it was quarter till.
They counted down from ten on the television, a few people in the kitchen were going right along with it. I was so confused by all of the noise, I was so distracted by everything going on around me, that when I turned around and faced the television they were all yelling "ONE!"
So it fell. That big, bright ball, fell onto the large numbers reading "2008".
It dawned on me. I realized that it was 2008 and that everything was the same. Sure, it's a new year. We're starting another year, and it will fly right by us all before we even know it. We will all be a year older again, and we will all still be trying to keep our heads above water. Trying to stay happy. Trying to make more money. Trying to quit smoking. Trying to live life to it's fullest.
I want to say that I have high hopes for the year, but really, I don't. I hope it is better than previous years. I hope I accomplish what I want. I don't see it as starting fresh. I don't understand how people talk about "starting the new year off right". How do you? What is the right way to start it?
I'm pretty sure that waking up with a hangover, isn't the way to do it though.