I
pierced my ear in the parking lot of the El Tapatio
Mexican Restaurant. It's something I'd been meaning to do for a while, and I figure now is always the best time.
I'd been with her for far too long out of laziness and a lack of self confidence. I'd stopped
believing in myself, which was the only reason I'd put up with these
games for so long. I started believing again, I realize that's what's been lacking. I'm slightly angry at her, for putting up with it so long. She thinks that she is the one who is leaving, but I know that
one phone call is all it takes to break her. I proved that last weekend, and I don't think I ever should have, nor do I need to again.
I won't be calling her again. I don't really want her back, I believe in myself again, and
I deserve better.
I'd always meant to pierce my ear.
Needles have been my biggest fear in life since, well, since as long as I can remember. They've always inspired terror and fear in me, so I really feel that I've confronted my internal demons by shoving a piece of metal through my own ear.
I deserve better than a charade of a relationship,
cheap meaningless sex, and hoping her number doesn't show on the caller id every time the phone rings. It's about damn time I remembered it.