My Daily Life as a Superhero
You all think it's so great. So easy. WOE IS ME! let me
share the
humdrum of my day today with you:
Woke up. Had shower. Had 15 minute debate with
myself as to what I should wear today. Put on Rocket Pants and
"Choose Life" t-shirt. Had
further 5 minute debate with self. Changed to "Shit Happens"
t-shirt.
Fed
cat. Left for work. Arrived at work, read newspaper on
company time.
Noticed
news article about local celebrity dog being stuck down drain for 48
hours.
Smelled good publicity opportunity. Fixed hair and used
Rocket Pants to
fly
to drain.
Waited 3 mins for crowd to gather. Flew down drain to
rescue dog. Got
bitten by dog. Cursed dog.
Put on heroic facial expression
and brought
dog
back to surface.
Revelled in glory. Fixed hair for photo shoot.
Photos taken
by local press. Flew back to office.
Checked PM edition of newspaper.
Photo
of me with dog snarling in background. Hair looked great.
Went home.
Had
dinner.
Watched Everybody Loves Raymond. Went to bed.