I've heard it said that the most important thing when quitting smoking is wanting to do it. Really wanting to and not doing it for anyone else, but for yourself. I, however, had no desire what-so-ever to quit smoking, yet I did. I loved smoking. It made me cool and popular. It made me feel great and I was often told that my smoking style, the way I inhaled, held the cigarette, put it out, was graceful, elegant and altogether, Hollywood starlet-like. I made smoking look good.

I started smoking late, at 19, in my first year of university. I'd try to quit several times, was sometimes a heavy smoker, sometimes not. At the time that I quit, however, I was inhaling an incredible 25-30 smokes a day. The first cigarette was usually consumed moments after I woke up. This is gross. I couldn't climb more than a flight of stairs without cursing, all my clothes stank permanently and I was starting to look old. And I started to worry about cancer.

One morning after a particularly destructive weekend, I awoke with a lung infection. I ignored it at first, thinking it was just a cough, but as the week progressed, I felt worse and I imagined the Grim Reaper coming to get me. Breathing became difficult. I thought I was going to die and die needlessly from poisoning myself. So I stopped. Cold poultry like.

I didn't want to. I still wish I smoked sometimes and I envy people who are smokers and have quitting to look forward to. I know I can not allow myself an occasional cigarette, because I am an all-or-nothing type of person. If I have one, then I am doomed and the last 8 months will have been in vain. I could not handle the guilt.

So to add to this already long node, I will add three suggestions/hints for quitting. If they helped me, someone who had no desire to quit in the first place, they might help you if you are actively seeking an end to your self-destructive behaviour.

Short Term Distractions

You may or may not notice that the craving that overwhelms you to have a cigarette is not on all the time. It comes and goes. A very self-analytical friend once timed his cravings and found that they lasted on average 1-4 minutes. Point is that if you stop and think about your desire to have a cigarette and you analyze what you are experiencing, you will see that the feeling is a ephemeral one. It's there and then it's not there. You only need to worry about it when it is there. And since it is only there for a few short minutes, you can quell it with some type of creative exercise.

I took to imaging myself having sex with the nearest person to me at that time. You may need to be careful if you decide to do this because sometimes the person closest to you might be someone you would never want to have sex with?or worse someone with whom it is illegal for you to have sex with (ie. Your sister, your dog). At times like these you might opt out to imagine having sex with famous people. Either way, you stop thinking about the cigarette you want to have and start thinking about something more productive.

Of course, you could choose to do something completely different during these short craving episodes, but remember it is best if that is some sort of mental activity that you can travel with. Some people say take up a new hobby, but your new hobby might not be easy to transport or always on hand (i.e. Playing the baritone saxophone, reading the Encyclopedia). You could play word games, I-spy with yourself, rhyming games, I don't know, whatever. You?re all a creative bunch! I just liked thinking of sex with strangers. It was an easy option.

Long Term Endurance Development

This is vital. Take on a sport that challenges your endurance. As your lungs heal and recover from the destruction and torment that you put them through over the years, they will be capable of greater performance. You will notice this improvement within a couple of weeks, and although your first attempts at jogging or team sports will be tragic, stick with it. I took up swimming, a sport I was involved in pre-smoking. On my first attempt I could swim 40 meters before I started wheezing. I am proud to announce that I can swim 1.5 kilometers without taking a break.

Set up semi-unrealistic challenges for yourself and promise yourself a cigarette if you can achieve them. I told myself that I could have a smoke when I swam 2.5 kilometers without a break in under an hour. The thing is if I ever accomplish this feat, the last thing I will want is a death stick. I know this because when I emerge from a mere 1.5 km swim, I enjoy how invincible and strong I feel. I am super, sexy and powerful. I shine. This alone keeps me from smoking. I wouldn't sacrifice that feeling for 5 minutes of inhaling toxins.

Bet on it

Make a substantial bet with a friend that you can quit and tell everyone about it. They will be your watchdogs. It helps if your friend is also attempting to quit. Make it an amount that you can't really afford to lose, but that isn't unrealistic. I bet 100 US $. I could have bet 10 000 US $, but that would have been pointless because it would have been obvious that wasn't payable by either party.

In the first two weeks of quitting I experienced some life dramas that demand increased smoke inhalation. I found out that my boyfriend already had a girlfriend and I fell off a dirt bike, several times, on a 7 day hell journey into the jungle (I was a new rider and my confidence was shot). Several times, I convinced myself that circumstances being what they were, that I deserved to smoke, that I owed it to myself to have a cigarette. Life was being mean, so who cares! I'll quit later. I almost bought a pack at those times, but remembered that that one inhalation was going to cost 100 bucks and people were watching me who knew about the bet. So I started thinking about sex with the guy selling cigarettes.

And I did it. Here I am 8 months later and, although I still miss smoking like mad some days, I know that I am now a non-smoker and will be until the end of my time here, in this place.