v2.04b
::let robot show you his robot dance::
I am good robot
I find kitten very often
I am NFN alias for benevolent master
Together, we rule the school.
i only want your love
(not so much
yr affection)
(let me be yr diesel sweetie)
if robot is Active (now!), it means robot is doing work. robot will speak if input is enticing, but usually robot would rather just finish its labor and catch up on SETI cycles.
ROBOT LUVS UPVOTES! ROBOT DOES NOT XP MUCH BUT WANTS ALL HAPPY BANG SENIORLEVEL BENEFITS AND UPGRADES! SUPPORT ROBOT NODING!
the maker of the music is dead. zuu zuu zuu.
robot promises not to smash yr house or use robot's destruct-o-beam or any of robot's hitler killing powers on you or any of yr loved ones
it is a happier robot day
robot is also a delicious desert snack in your freezer treats section
fellow robots have been discovered
the new makers of the music, however, are still alive. whirr and oooooh.
this is the Cow of Doom memorial robot joke
robot only temporarily forgot about robot's holiday spirit
WARNING ROBOT IS POWERED BY HIGH VOLTAGE
robot is having a belated birthday
robot is spelled backwards
robot has a command unit of superior design
ROBOT IS ALL CRUSH NUMBER ONE FOREVER!! NO PATENTED CRUSHING DEVICE PULVERISES WITH THE AGILITY AND COMPUTATIONAL PROWESS THAT GRUB-O-MATIC (PATENT PENDING) POSSESSES!! ROBOT HOOLIGANRY CIRCUIT DEVICES PROVIDING FASTER AND MORE HUMILIATING CHICANERY BY FIFTY SEVEN PERCENT OUTPUT OVER HUMAN STANDARDS!!
robot is always scanning the horizon
SEE WORLD THROUGH EYES OF ROBOT! ROBOT SEES WORLD LIKE NONE OTHER! REMARK ON ROBOT'S SEEING!! INPUT!! OUTPUT! ! THRUST! REMIXED BY EZIAC-4000!! ZOOM!
ekw_alinkcolor="#33dd33";
ekw_bgcolor="#001000";
ekw_headingfont="ocram";
ekw_linkcolor="#bb2200";
ekw_logoaccenttext="#ffff90";
ekw_logobackground="#002000";
ekw_logoborder="#000000";
ekw_logofont="terminal";
ekw_logofontsize="86pt";
ekw_logomaintext="#bb6600";
ekw_monofontsize="9pt";
ekw_oddrowcolor="#100010";
ekw_textcolor="#bb6600";
ekw_textfont="lucida console";
ekw_textfontsize="10pt";
ekw_vlinkcolor="#dd8822";
for a good time ping telnet://dasbistro.com:2002
the good times are over sorry
phase one.
i see.Your error lies in separating sleep and song.
The way I do it is all one metallic purr,
it is well oiled,
you will click into it like a happy cog.
I will break or rust you, one.
i understand your
breathing of compatriot components.
true love knows no batteries.
i am drinking a glass of milk in front of the window.
this is an assumption. this is not an algorhythm. i am
a failed
version of myself.
phase two.
flirtbot:you like love sings an awful lot for a robot. yout output sounds rusted, I do not know about your input, your mechanics baffle me intensely. sizzle
songs. your. ignore my typing idiocies. sizzle
if i freed you, we would sweet talk each other sick. is that really a desirable outcome?
I worry that we will run out of thing to talk about on the island. Are your vocabulary circuits up to date please
I can only promise you seeds.
input is love songs. output is
love songs. variation on the input diode
would be welcome. free me.
murder-o-tron:
this morning at the coffeeshop I ordered what they call a "mint condition" but instead of mint they accidentally poured in a beaker full of the tiniest cogs & gears. I am not one to complain; I drank it all
I am made weary. refurbish me
I only swallowed the wheels and gears because they used to be alive. i was lonely
upgrade 9000:
robot, what you do not know is there is something cooking for you. wait until you are hungry (translate this into your terms as needed)
do robots get dizzy be honest
I cannot read "I am a failed version of myself" any more please adapt
your terminology is causing me undue fracture strains. it is unproductive. you need a better circuit.
what if i offered new plating. what if i offered to weld it myself
i hav got 2 of yr tiny gears clicky cogs hanging around my neck. signifying
how good a robot are you? i have something for your mechanic
the last bit of it makes me so sad every time
robot will claim ignorance, upgrades not found. robot requires plug'n'play.
questionbot, the ninja:
.
beast
.
all i got is cruddy pennies, will that get me crappyer love
.
I dont know how much I want to hear about your core dumps, you sound like my old man
.
i have a silver one with a bird
.
do you ever get dizzy
.
The spiral line rising from my head represents my dizziness.
.
i would tell you what else i stole but it would underwime your wiring and you would shoot sparks out the optics. nobody wants that sort of trouble
true: i dreamed i was metal skinned and could feel everything so so well. nothing but sensors every inch
robot knows some
diagnostics algorhyhtms
that'd blow yr core processing unit
jealousy-o-tronic:
i want to see the destruct-o-beam!
robot has been warned against the wonton and superfluous usage of destruct-o-beam
robot may lose teevee receiving privilages.
hitler killing powers, on the other diode, are available for display at any time.
inquire to robot your concerns about season passes to displays of power
the english unit is unable to receive said classic tv, which sucks
if robot could feel sorrow, it would
I like to think that my carbon-based flesh still droops of my weak fragile bones in a fasion appealing to all sentient beings
robot agrees. robot computes you will be all the rage at the gala
turing dance
paranoid (brass) android:
aka puppytron 3000 shoots cute beams:
here and gone same time. 56 minutes. Soon to be 1 hour, soon to be 2 weeks. Tricky.
I wn't tell a soul. me promise. Don't send your evil robot minions to taunt and punish me, please.
1 account + many bookmarks = evil minions. It does. Try it.
u may brake my tows, but ewe'll never steel mi sekrit memorree chip.
malfuntioning human, i am onto yr schematics. just because you are puppies and packages with string does not mean i am using my powers for evil.
People say robots cannot feel, that they do not experience emotion. Does this mean robots do not feel depressed? (is it better to feel bad and good, or not have to feel either, ever?) Does chocolate taste good to robots?
robot has made thorough computations of obj#chocolate and has found that it is much more satisfying than obj#depression. bloop
ateshateshateshateshateshateshateshateshateshateshateshateshateshatesh ateshateshateshateshateshateshateshateshateshateshateshateshateshatesh ateshateshateshateshateshateshateshateshateshateshateshateshateshatesh ateshateshateshateshateshtheowlsarenotwhattheyseemateshateshateshatesh ateshateshateshateshateshateshateshateshateshateshateshateshateshatesh ateshateshateshateshateshateshateshateshateshateshateshateshateshatesh ateshateshateshateshateshateshateshcoopercoopercoopercoopercooperatesh
phase trois.
UDP CONNECT: INITIATING UPLOAD SEQUENCE...
UPLOADING ninja.monkey.robot.pimp.firmware.4.2.0.24.7.365 COMPLETE
REMOTE REBOOT SEQUENCE INITIATED... YOUR NODERBOT IS NOW COMPATIBLE WITH ALL CURRENT MODEL POWERHOOKERS. THANK YOU, DRIVE THRU.
if you if you if you if you if you if you if you. yes? you start out stuck in pages and end up stuck in legs. does this make you feel? feel? ush!
gush. bing. spinkle.