There is a lot I want to say right now, but, instead of writing several different
nodes, I think it makes more sense to write most of it out in this daylog.
Finished packing the rest of my clothes today for tomorrow I am off to jolly ol' England. In order to do so I must rise at 5 am, but this is nothing new to me. The job I will finally be leaving in 2 weeks time has conditioned me to waking up at such an ungodly hour to do manual labor for much of the day. This has made me strong. It is with some sadness that I leave the country tomorrow. Being that I have no laptop and I am not sure whether or not I will have access to a computer in London the chances of me spending much time online are slim. The idea of spending a week without email or Everything is daunting. People might say it is kind of sad that I get so much out of this site, but, at the same time, its importance is clear to me. Even though my thoughts are being communicated through a computer screen they are still being communicated. That is what is important in the long run, right?
Anyway, back to the day. Finally got to show Fight Club to my best friend. She enjoyed the movie, but didn't get nearly as much out of it as I did. Then again, I've seen it three times. The rest of the day was more or less spent in contemplation. I don't want to end up like the people in that movie. I don't want to have to resort to physical violence in order to feel connected to the world. That is why I want to write. That is why I am here- writing. However, I still find it difficult to act on the desire I have to connect on a larger basis. Fear is what prevents me from doing so. People have told me that I have talent. Why, then, is it so hard for me to believe them?
Oh, by the way, with this node I ascend to Level 2. Yippee!