Way back in '95 when the Internet nayer existed,
a twist of fate landed me some money,
and then and there it was, no way I could resist it.
Brand new, monitor and all,
It stood beside my last computer, brave, strong and tall.
This symbol of prestige, of power, of pride; mocked my friends,
Who turned green with envy, and red with sighs.
"How could he?" they asked, "It just isn't fair"
"While we languish and struggle with, DOS and 3.1"
"He's cuddled up with '95, multitasking, and DOOM, what fun!
But pray tell what was this source of unquenchable jealousy,
of snidery, of foolishness, and wayward devilrey
A Pentium 166?!?! Well no wonder, what a delicate specialty!!
Fast forward to the year twenty-twenty-one,
and look if you dare,
how the mighty have fallen!!
I've even lost my hair...
Moore you bastard you stole away my fame,
I am now but a laughing stock,
A freak, a l0ser, my turn to bottle the shame.
I weep, and cry, here comes a seg fault,
"no more space", the hard drive says
"The DLL's are choking me, you must get more help!!"
"Some RAM, a burner, maybe a new mouse?"
"Please, oh leader, make me strong again!!"
"Nay my beige beast, tiss not possible,"
"for you're too old to make young again."
So here I am, screaming at Netscape, and loathing Java
A click to everything,
that will take some time,
So I twiddle my thumbs, pout like a child, and can only muse,
"Beware my friends, someday the revenge will be mine!!!"