I have such a good time, but sometimes, in the haste of my good
fortune, I neglect my
problems. Sure I'll have fun, I'll smile, I'll
joke and
laugh, but it is so
easy to pretend if you forget the things that make you
tick.
Sometimes you reach that point where you are having such a good time, that when the bad reaches up and pulls you back down you just want to collapse. You go from low to high in that instant, surrounded by your friends, but at the same time you are somewhere else.
It hurts even more then, and at those times I really feel bad, when people turn to me and ask me
"what's the matter?" and I just tell them
"nothing" or,
"don't worry about it." And I'll admit, I really do want them to ask. I want them to know what I'm thinking, if only for the sake of understanding how pathetic I feel at those times.
I'll just leave them there, wondering what they did to make me like that, but I will never explain, because I'd like to keep my friends.