My
dad has thrown quite a bit of information at me when I was growing up. Some of it, like
don't pee in the wind and
don't eat yellow snow are indispensible. Others, like
women, you can't live with em and you can't shoot em and
if you quit tee-ball, you'll be a quitter for life are best taken with a grain of salt. And I don't know
WTF to make of his two cents on Plastic Jesus.
My dad says that back in the day, when he was a real greaseball with his hog and grass, he was in a band. And his band wrote a song called Plastic Jesus. It went as follows:
Oh I don't care if it rains or freezes
Long as I've got my plastic Jesus
Riding on the dashboard of my car.
It comes in colors pink and pleasant
Glows in the dark. It's an irridescent.
Buy it *pause* at your local bar.
Now if your faith begins to falter
Build yourself a plywood altar
And drink your wine from a teflon chalice bowl.
Throw a feast on a third floor upper
Invite your friends; it's your last supper
Be the first one on your block to save your soul.
My dad claims that one of his old band buddies gave the song to Ernie Marrs, who made it a hit without giving props to my old man. Maybe pops has got more talent than I give him credit for. Maybe he's full of horse shit. One thing's for sure though...
He had sex with my mom?