Before writing this up, I knew I'd need a cup of
coffee. Please bear with me, as what I'm about to write about has hurt me like nothing else.
Yes.
Natalie. Her name was Natalie.
I met her through my
brother,
Bill. Bill told me how great she was, and that he wanted to go out with her. I
smiled, happy for my brother, and
eager to meet this girl I had heard so much of. The
day I met her, she told me she was
vegetarian. At first, I didn't think too much about her. I just thought she was a great girl, and I hoped my brother would be
happy with her.
The day after I
met her, my brother was trying to teach her how to
skateboard. He would put one
hand on her
shoulder and one near her cute little
ass. Then he would
say, "
Run, Natalie, Run." She would run and
skateboard along. When my brother was off on the board on his own, I joked with her about him putting his hand on her
butt. She laughed and I
mocked the motion. As time went on, she started to come to see
me in
homeroom. I would
smack her butt every time I saw her as a little
joke. She would
smile and
laugh with me and say, "Would you stop that?"
Soon, she would call, and instead of asking for my brother, she would just
talk to me. Time
progressed, and so did our
relationship. We
grew close. She would
sneak in my window at 1:30AM and stay until 3:00AM.
Everything was going very well, and we were
slowly falling in love with each other. Then one day we were at one of her friend's house's, and she was
begging her mom to let Natalie sleep over. Suddenly, she said, "Come on mom, she leaves in a
month!" My
smile fell quickly, and I could feel the color fading from my face. I
walked away. I had known she was leaving for
Chile for 10
months for a while, but I never
imagined that she would leave in a month. Later, I asked her about it. She
confirmed that she left in one month, one day. I said, "Oh".
And that was the
beginning of a long, love testing
journey, which has
stretched me to my limit every day of my life
since. Time
passed, and I knew I wanted to tell her I loved her, but I couldn't find the right moment. My
friend gave me suggestions, and listened to all my
bitching. I am very
grateful for what he's done for me. Then one day, we were online and she said, "Natalie loves you!!!". I said "Who's this?", as I thought it was someone else, due to the
third person reference. She said "It's me" and I said, "I love you too".
Two weeks before she was to
leave, she left for
Niagra Falls for a week. I then learned, first hand, how bad the next 10 months were going to
hurt. Those two weeks were hell for me.
I tried to spend as much
time as
possible with her. After she got back from her week in Niagra Falls, she saw me every single day for the last week she was
here, except the
last day. The first day I saw her of that
last week, I bought her a $400
diamond necklace. The last time we saw each other, we thought we were going to
meet again, but she left
early the next day. She
cried, and I
cried. That was
August 12, 2000. It is now
August 22, 2000.
Through the
help of
friends, I have
come to appreciate what she's given me. We still talk every day through
e-mail, and we both
eagerly anticipate the day we can see each other again. I
love that girl.