Today, again, was a day that I hope only happens
once in a blue moon. While not a day of complete physical exhaustion, it was a day of complete
mental breakdown. Some know how it is, with the throbbing
migraine and
shaky hands. But at least it was a profitable day in the least.
The night was very dry but very cold. The wind blew in from the west, and made a stiff wind that made it seem like winter again. From the little crevasse made in my patio window, it made a slightly whistling noise, sort of harmonious in the dark, where I sat brooding. I was still on my
cell phone, talking to a lady friend, long removed. We haven't talked to each other for months, simply because we
drifted apart. She had her own life to lead, and with her
boyfriend around, I didn't want to interfere. But finally, I wound up calling her anyways, because
I missed her, sentimentally and because I used to like her. We spoke, small talk, then it started getting into tense topics so I decided to make her laugh. I always could do that. I guess my mix of
dirty jokes with my own witty repertoire made me funny to her. I just hope that she was laughing with me, not
laughing at me.
Today was
Dawadeving's birthday so I called him at about 12:40AM. The guy was sleeping so I wound up waking his mom up. I felt bad and apologized and hope that she understood. I got him his
beer too but I have an idea what to get him his present. But I'll work on it another time. I don't have the time nor the patience to get it right now.
I stayed up until about 6 AM, listening to
Fin.K.L. and
S.E.S.. It was too cold to be outside, but I looked out through my balcony door. I placed both of my hands on the glass and could feel the heat from my hand flow through my palms into the glass. I glimpse to the left, and then to the right. The sky was cloudy, but the moon was shining through the clouds. It was an unusual day, one that happens
once in a blue moon.
I wake up about noontime. Great. Work in 2 hours. I head over to work an hour later. It was a split shift, where I would work in one department the first part of my shift then another department the last half. During my breaks, I did work for my home department because I didn't want to leave all the work to my co-worker. I wanted to be a nice guy but everyone was talking to me while I was working. They wanted me to relax. While it was a nice gesture, I didn't want to stop. It showed me how tense I was, getting annoyed at such a simple gesture.
I finished work, tired but tense. I saw some old friends there, a couple of lady friends just shopping, not knowing that I worked there. Sort of nice actually, as a surprise. I think its called a
pleasant surprise. I was working, then someone hugged me from behind. Then the giggling ruined their surprise. We spoke for about 30 minutes before a manager told me to get back to work, at least kiddingly. It was a nice surprise, but after they left, I started thinking about how much I missed them and all the times that we used to hang out and talk. My feet dragged along the laminated flooring, with my head down. By the end the night, my mind was drained of all interesting conversational material or any intelligent content.
I come home, then head over to the tub. Soaking in the water like a sponge, my body felt great afterwards, and since then I've been online. Its 4:30 AM now, with
Dragonball Z on TV. I have my
Fin.K.L. on my winamp, and I just finished playing
Super Nintendo using my emulator. I finally finished my
Fin.K.L. node. That's how starstruck I've been about them. Damn them sexy young adult asian women. Getting my hopes up by letting me see them scantily clad knowing that people like me can't get them. The loveliness continues.
I'm finally off to bed and with no time to lose. My mind has lost itself within the void which is my consciousness. I work in about 4.5 hours, and hope that tomorrow will be a day unlike today.
Let it drift, let it slide. I walk out with open arms, waiting for my baby to come to me. When she gets here, I'll look her in the eyes and clasp hands with her. I'll whisper sweet nothings in her ear, and her sweet giggles will send shivers of pure
ecstacy down my spine. It is only a dream, but let it be a waking dream, a reality that I don't have to wake up to. I blink, I pray, I cry, I sleep..