The Message you will never get
Was that guilt or pity? You cannot do this to me. You have no idea
how much you've hurt me, I have no idea of how to deal with this, everything
that happens everyday reminds me of you, even stupid little things
you were part of my life in everyway and I don't know how to stop it
I want to get rid of everything that reminds me of you but
I can't get rid of the things in my head. I really want you to share some
of this pain, i can't believe that you still love me because you couldn't just
walk away if you did.
Why did you make me come to the bar last night?
make me sit there and go through it all again, it was cruel and cold, if
there was no chance for us to try again you should have just told me when
you got my letter instead of letting me go through more days of misery.
And then to put it off for another day, only be able to give me an hour or
so and to do it in a public place was just so heartless. And you just sat
there looking like you couldnt wait to get away. I would never have
done that to you. I would never have done any of this to you.
If you do still love me, please tell me how you are going to deal with this?
I need to know so that maybe I can do the same and it wont be so bad. How
are you going to get up every morning and carry on like nothing ever happened.
Are you going to be able to think about London, Heavens Gate, eating sweets
at the pictures, listen to cd's, go shopping, drink champagne, wear certain
clothes, watch certain films, smell perfume on someone and be instantly reminded,
are you going to be able to do all that and much much more without feeling
If you can please share it with me.
You seemed hurt that I don't want to see you again but you sat there and said
you don't want to hold me or kiss me or make love to me again. You haven't loved
and lost, you've chosen to throw it away. It wasn't a safety choice it was a
No real love, no emotion, no risk and no second chance.
really loved me you would have taken the chance but in your heart you don't, it
wasn't worth it and thats what you should have said.
You should have said you didn't love me you should have said you believe you've
made the right choice, if you don't want someone anymore you should let them go
not leave them knowing that you still feel the same way.
I go over and over what you said, but I can't believe that you would rather
see me as just a friend than not see me at all. To be able to do that means that
the feelings you have just aren't the same as mine. If you feel that same way as
I do how can you want to see me but know that we can't be together.
I don't want
to hurt myself by seeing you why would you want to hurt yourself by seeing me? Unless
it won't hurt youto see me because you don't really love me, and never really did.