A rather humorous non-a cappella song by the a cappella group Da Vinci's Notebook. Typical of the group, those three little words could never be I love you.

This song is a takeoff of the Meat Loaf song Paradise By The Dashboard Light. As with that tune, this song is broken into distinct sections.

Part I: Bloodshot Demons

The song starts with a fairly simple piano & vocal duet, smooth and easy. The lyrics are almost ballad-like, including:
And I'd never seen a woman looking better than she did
On that lonely deep dark hot summer night.
and:
Maybe I don't know what I'm asking you for
And maybe I know it ain't right
Won't you pull my finger, baby
'Til the morning light.

Part II: Gotta Get Out

As the tempo increases, the energy of the vocalist seems to increase. The lyrics also shift from smooth easy to a driving, pushing schmaltz:
So I got on my bike and headed out on the road
At a hundred million miles an hour

Part III: A Hockey Game

Cut in to a radio announcer at a hockey match:
<spoken>
... Duchesne brings the puck up towards the center line,
looks for the open man, passes over to Hunter who
takes a shot from the point, wide left...

Part IV: The Big Ending

Cut back to our hero and the girl he was singing to at the start. A sappy back-and-forth duet. A sample:
Him:

Her:

Pull my finger

Put it away

Pull my finger

Please don't ask me again

You know that I need for you to

I'm tired of your childish games

Pull my finger


Improvements from the original Meat Loaf include changing the baseball play by play to the hockey you see a part of above, and shifting the topic over to flatulence. As seen in the required Thanks! section of the album this song is contained within: "... Julie Murphy Wells (no one ever sang more expressively about gas)...".

Music and lyrics © 1999 Sleestack Serenade Music, ASCAP. From the album The Life and Times of Mike Fanning. I can't do it justice in text -- check http://www.davincisnotebook.com for a sample.