REVIEW of THE GRINCH
Starring Jim Carrey and Some Other, Unimportant People Who, Combined, Probably Make Less Than A Fourth Of His Salary
As I was sitting in the darkened theater waiting for this movie, one thought was running ominously through my brain: "I have only a few moments remaining in my life during which I can honestly say I have never seen a computer-aided Jim Carrey in a green Muppet costume, excluding previews." It turns out that the suit itself isn't bad. However, the actual movie has permanently raised the level of cynicism fluid in my cerebellum, further restricting forever my ability to experience beauty and wonder.
The biggest problem with The Grinch is that it is unnecessary. The cartoon version, directed by the legendary Chuck Jones and supervised by Dr. Seuss himself, was closer to perfection than most endeavors of man and mankind. I mean, the Grinch’s voice in the cartoon was provided by Boris Karloff! Boris Karloff! For the love of God, Boris Karloff. Throughout the intrusive, rhyming narrative portions of this film, the famous words from the cartoon ran through my head alongside the new reading. In all cases, the cartoon version struck better notes than the movie.
The second problem was with the Whos, the primary inhabitants of Whoville. In the cartoon, and in the book, the Whos were just sort of there. Excepting Cindy Lou Who, Who Was No More Than Two, the Whos were not important as individual characters, and rightfully so. The focus should be on the Grinch in his majestic meanness. In the cartoon they existed basically to serve as a victims for the Grinch and to catalyze his sudden cardiac growth at the end. Disturbing was the introduction of a Who love interest for Grinchypants. I warn you now, if you let your mind wander along the direction of picturing a Grinch/Who crossbreed you will inevitably waste days of your life, a fair portion of which being in therapy. More importantly, the role of villain has shifted from the Grinch to the Mayor of Whoville, who is now seen as the childhood tormentor for the Grinch and as a rival for female attention. "But," as I screamed to myself through the film, repeatedly and more sadly with each shout, “The Grinch is supposed to be the villain!” I tell you, the ushers soon put a stop to that. Cindy Lou Who, WWNMTT, has been given an expanded role, primarily to be saved by the Grinch twice and to teach everyone the True Meaning of Christmas.
Finally, and worst, Jim Carrey’s Grinch suit, seen from behind, often gives the impression of viewing a huge, furry green ass.