Node your homework? Fuck that. I don't want to hear about database relational algebra and you don't either. Node your dinner!

This soup is loosely based on the lentil soup found at Carrabba's. With my friend's mother being the consummate Italian that she is, Strega Umlauf locked the recipe deep into her taste buds and proceeded to recreate the concoction in her secret kitchen lair. It's a great recipe to keep on hand as the weather turns cold or if you're living on a tight budget.

Ingredients:
1 pound Italian sausage - $4.00
1 8oz package sliced white mushrooms - $2.00
1 14oz can of diced tomatoes - $.60
1 package of Knorr's Vegetable Soup Mix - $1.50
4 14.5oz cans of chicken broth - 4 x $.65
3/4 pound of lentils -$.79
salt, pepper, crushed red pepper and minced garlic to taste
olive oil, if desired to brown sausage

Tools:
3 quart or better pot
can opener
wooden spoon and ladle
knife

Time: 1.5 hours

Servings: 6 hearty bowls, more if you're less hearty.

Price: $11.49 as listed above, excluding spices

Instructions:

  1. If present, remove the skin from sausage with your knife.
  2. In a 3+ quart pot, use a half dollar size amount of oil, brown sausage using medium-high heat (half way between medium and high).
  3. When sausage is almost done browning, add mushrooms. You may add salt, pepper and/or garlic at this point.
  4. When sausage is browned, add dry soup mix. Stir contents of pot and immediately open your can of diced tomatoes.
  5. Pour the entire can of diced tomatoes into the pot.
  6. Open and add all 4 cans of chicken broth.
  7. Stir pot occasionally until it comes to a low boil.
  8. Add lentils.
  9. When the soup begins to boil again, cover pot and allow it to vent. Reduce heat to medium.
  10. Cook, stirring occasionally for an hour, or until lentils are tender. Be aware that as the lentils boil, the soup will grow more and more brown. Not your fault.

Tips:

  • Adding more or less lentils will make the soup thicker or thinner, respectively. Adding more lentils has the added benefit of increasing your soup to dollars ratio.
  • If your soup appears to turn out too thick, add in more water. Start with about 1/2 can and see if that works for you.
  • If you don't like pork sausage, you can make your own sausage with any ground meat, fennel and crushed red pepper to taste.
  • One thing that makes this an outstanding cold weather treat is the extra kick you get from the Italian sausage and red pepper. If Italian sausage is as spicy as you like to get, skip the red pepper. About a teaspoon of crushed red pepper will make the soup appreciably spicy without being overwhelming. YMMV.
  • Unless you're feeding the area rugby team, you'll have leftovers. Luckily, this dish stores very well and can be frozen for another day.