BOB and DOUG:Cthulhu-loo coo coo-loo coo! Cthulhu-loo coo coo loo coo!

BOB: Good day, eh? I'm Bob McKenzie and this is my brother, Doug.

DOUG: How's it going eh? Welcome to The Great White North!

BOB: Today on the show we're gonna talk about the Great Old Ones, eh?

DOUG: I had some old Molson's eh? In stubbies. They were great old ones until they went all skunky eh?

BOB: Take off you hosehead! We're not talkin' about beer eh?

DOUG: Why not eh? I'm out. Gimme another, you hoser!

BOB: Here you go eh!

DOUG: Beauty!

BOB: So like today we're lookin' at this book, the Necronomicon. Where'd it go eh?

DOUG: That leather book? I took it to the john eh? We're outta TP.

BOB: TAKE OFF! You didn't open it, didja, hosehead?

DOUG: Like, I had to use a couple of pages eh?

The room shakes. The floor begins to crack. Beer spills1.

BOB: Like that's all the time we have today eh? See you next week!

DOUG: Good day eh?

Tentacles begin to writhe through the crack on the floor. One wraps around a two four and hauls it into the depths. Doug leaps after it.

BOB: Give back our brew you ancient hoser!

Bob adjusts his toque and leaps after Doug. The room collapses. Fade to black.

1. This is the horror part, hosehead.