The lost biomenace of Hussein (thing)
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It has been said the first known incident related to biological weaponry took place in the 14th century, when infected corpses were catapulted over the Kaffa walls (see the write-up Biological weapons by RubenAzarja.)
However recent discoveries challenge such a statement. They firmly suggest biological weapons root in a more remote past, which connects with the deposed Hussein's regime. The facts supporting this theory come from amazing news that can be summarized as follows.
The sadly infamous Chinese spy Yel-low Thi-ef stole a few days ago important documents hidden in an allegedly inaccessible drawer of the CIA Secret Papers Dpt. Since a widespread broadcasting of their contents could result, however, in improvement of the US President's popularity, the government resolved to clarify the worrying hearsay and reveal that a massive storehouse of spears and arrows of Iraqi origin had been found, buried deep on the slopes of Turkey's Mount Ararat. These weapons, showing significant traces of animal dung-related toxins, could have posed a serious threat of poisoning to civilizing societies.
Some local residents, after being skilfully interrogated by CIA stuntmen, painted a picture of an enormous boat buried in a glacier, with the weapons stored in ad hoc stone boxes. How the huge Iraqi ship came to the summit of that mountain still remains a mistery. However, the US President's opinion is that the location of the weapons site supports the fact that we were cunning enough to not underestimate the power of Saddam Hussein to hide such dangerous implements.
Further in situ examinations revealed thousands of fossilized bones inside the ship. Moreover CIA experts have established they belong to species not native to Turkey (elephants, rhinos, gorillas, python snakes, and -likely- genetically engineered crocodiles.) General Tommy Franks stated such bones show the Hussein resoluteness of employing top technology in order to develop appalling bio-weapons.
An irrefutable link between the warship and New Mesopotamia came from clay tablets -written in a cryptic cuneiform style- also discovered on board. Cipher experts have been working 24-hour shifts to decode the information they contain. Among their findings, there are so far records scheduling the storage of breeding couples of every living species. The above data suggest Hussein was involved in a great scale project to improve his weapons systems.
This investigation proves not only the dark origin but the definite long-term threat that poses such archaic weapons. Despite the lack of actual evidence of standard weapons of mass destruction in Iraq, now we must admit President Bush made the right decision when he chose to stop by all means the awful bio-menace.