The modern drink coozie is a marvel of materials engineering. If you've ever taken one off of your drink and examined it closely, you'll find a suprisingly resilient yet supple foamy material with the perfect amount of cushiony padding ability and stretchiness. This more than the foam's insulating properties, is perhaps the most amazing quality of the common coozie.

My personal experience alone has seen the coozie material sliced and diced, shaped, formed, and otherwise manipulated for a variety of purposes. I have seen it used as padding in splints and casts to prevent chafing of the skin on the hard material; as elbow and knee pads, corn pads, bunion pads, and partial insoles; and as support pads under vibrating machinery. It is a wonderful sound and vibration dampener, and a near-perfect shock absorbing material. If I could sleep on a bed made entirely from coozie foam, I think I'd be possibly the happiest person on Earth!

The next time you break out a cold drink and prepare to slide on the freebie coozie you got that is printed with "First State Bank" or "Billy-Bob's Plumbing Supply - We're plumb happy to serve you", take a moment to look closely at the every-day miracle that you hold in your hand. Surely you can find a more noble purpose for this miraculous substance.