The famous topical cream used for the relief of hemorrhoids - trademarked, of course.

Best used at the first onset of symptoms to avoid further discomfort or irritation. The products should especially be used at night, in the morning and after each bowel movement. It comes in several forms: ointment/cream, hydrocortisone 1% anti-itch cream, suppositories and cooling gel.

All forms claim to temporarily shrink hemorrhoidal tissue and relieve burning sensation. Some are marketed for temporary relief of itching, others for coating and protecting the inflamed, irritated anorectal surface to help make bowel movements less painful.

Curiously, I remember that a professor at uni said that Preparation H (TM) was also famous of its anti-wrinkle effect on face skin. Hmmm.... I wonder if the formulation is still the same.

I attempted to look up it's ingredients on www.preparationh.com, but it still remains elusive.
Who invented it?

Got a pain in the ass? Try

Prepation H Hemorrhoidal Ointment

Active ingredients: Mineral oil 14%, Petrolatum 71.9%, Phenylephrine HCl 0.25%, shark liver oil 3.0%

Inactive ingredients: beeswax, benzoic acid, BHA, corn oil, glycerin, lanolin, lanolin alcohol, methylparaben, paraffin, propylparaben, thyme oil, tocopherol, water

Directions: adults: when practical, cleanse the affected area by patting or blotting with an appropriate cleansing wipe. Gently dry by patting or blotting with a tissue or a soft cloth before applying ointment; apply to the affected area up to 4 times daily, especially at night, in the morning or after each bowel movement; Intrarectal use: remove cover from applicator, attach applicator to tube, lubricate applicator well and gently insert applicator into the rectum, thoroughly cleanse applicator after each use and replace cover; also apply ointment to external area; regular uses provides continual therapy for relief of symptoms; children under 12 years of age: ask a doctor

Remember, kids, Preparation H ain't nothing to joke about. Hundreds of thousands of people need it, and may not even know it. But the main thing to keep in mind is that this is not the only treatment for hemorrhoids. See a doctor if problem persists. It is not possible to overdose on external use of Preparation H, but too much would just be generally uncomfortable and squishy. We don't want that now, do we?

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