I am at a convention center. I hear that one of my co-workers, Patrick, has committed suicide. I also learn that he is distantly related to me. My grandfather is running the funeral, as he is a minister. I become very sullen and wander off and find a table full of chocolate muffins. Sudenly, the entire world population is in the room. This witch/sorceress/villainess appears with a big wand stick thingy. She hits people with it, and they die. The women that she hits turn into chicken eggs, and the men turn into mist. She has now killed everyone except me and this old black woman and her granddaughter and grandson. The girl has a nametag on that says "Ovaries." I can read her thoughts and she is thinking "What are olaves?" but I knew she meant "olives." The small boy has a nametag that says "Apostle."
Then I wake up.
One wierd dream right here. But here we go! This dream apparently is my idea for a Volkswagen Bug commercial.

An outside view of the blue Bug, as it cruises along. Girl in the passenger seat. Music blaring (Suck on my dick........is what you wanna do.........yeah(Da Dik Suk by DJ Boom Boom)). The blue Bug pulls up to a stop sign, and the view transfers inside the vehicle. The girl says to the driver, "This is gonna be a long night!" The driver grins. A pack of high school kids walks by, and one says, "Hey, cute car!". The guy sticks his middle finger out the window and screams, "Hey, fuck you!". (Anyone who's seen the VW Bug "Rally" commercial knows where this came from) The shot transfers to the outside view once again, and the vehicle cruises along, music blaring, ready to party.

Interesting dream, huh? If VW actually had an advertising campaign like this, I might actually buy one of those gaymobiles. Imagine that.
I'm invited by one of the old presidents of Mexico to live in this houseboat on international waters with fifteen foreign exchange students from places like Tanzania, Morocco, Lithuania, Mongolia,.. so in general, not-so-exotic places. I decline the invitation, and now I am in my bedroom trying to masturbate, but I have this fear that I'm being watched. So I realize my windowblinds are pulled up and someone is watching me. I panic, and throw them down, and immediately quit. That's when I leave my bedroom to go to the kitchen to get my breakfast. Because all of my stepbrother's friends saw me masturbating, they suddenly want to hang around me. So I spend the day hanging around these 13-year-old boys who normally make fun of me for being such a geek. It's nighttime, and we're in this great deal of trouble, and we have to fix what we did wrong by the next morning. It's 10:30, so I run into the house, and my mom is at my house sitting on the couch and she asks me where I am going. I fib and say I'm going down to someone's house. She asks who. I tell her Alan (one of my stepbrother's friends, who in this dream is my best friend). I take the telephone with me, so I can call her from wherever I am pretending that I am at someone's house. As we are standing outside at my bus stop, we see this short bus coming down the street. It stops at my bus stop, and the windows have been painted over. I get on, and the last couple of seats of the bus are boarded up to the seat height, and back there sitting are these kids from my school. I can only recognize this boy that wears these big rings of black make-up around his eyes (imagine a giant panda) and a short boy who babbles on about his new girlfriend that he doesn't even know. I take a seat in the seat in front of them (as there are only 5 rows of seats on the entire bus), and as I am sitting down. My phone rings. I answer it, and it's my mom. She wants to know if I'm wearing my towel over my head like we discussed. I guess we were part of some Douglas Adams book cult.

I arrive at school, and Ben and I are in the cafeteria and are upgrading school computers to this BRAND SPANKING NEW DOS 6.0(!!!!!) We are so excited about this, now our school has great technological capabilities. I remember though, when I rebooted the computer, everything looked like KDE and GIMP opened up. And in GIMP, there was a large graphic of Steve Case and Dem Bones shaking hands. They were signing a contract to merge E2 with AOL. I screamed, and Ben, who was now on the other side of the cafeteria chatting with one of the lunch ladies, ran over and asked what was going on. I showed him the graphic, and he was so startled by this that his hair stood at end with this huge expression of shock on his face and all his hair fell out. Dem Bones had this new webpage at some place like www.aolsuperimposementsex.com. On the page, there was pictures from an E2/AOL corporate orgy that had taken place when everyone was in Redmond. Psuedo_Intellectual, Nate, Icicle, and some user I have never heard of named Ukatan_For_Babies were wearing Kaiser helmets and tying down Mojoe to this ironing board.

I turned off the computer, and Ben and I went to this new theology class our school had. After class, Ben looked at me and said, "If it weren't for Scientology, I would have no respect for Everquest." We went to the computer lab where we played Everquest until this alarm went off and I woke up.

I fucking hate talking about my lame love life, but I'll record my dream anyways.

It was her again. She's in my dreams now, how fucking lame. Anyways, this one was a weird one. It definitely has something to do with my preference of white girls over Asian chicks. I don't remember everything in the dream, but there was one scene that was really scary and destroyed my love for everything.

I was in the bus going somewhere, maybe nowhere. The bus had stopped at the Boston Pizza stop in the afternoon. Somebody was cackling from the back of the bus. I turned around to see this Girl. She was white and I had never seen her before, but she seemed familiar. She looked at me, peered into my secrets, pierced my soul. It felt so intrusive. And she continued to laugh like one of those Evil Anime Women...like Ryouko in Tenchi. Then there was this flashback picture cycling through my mind. She was the Goth Girl, but she was White for some reason.

Nothing makes sense...

Ashram Resort

  • I'm lying naked on a soft mat in a bright, warm room. Sunlight pours in through the sliding glass doors leading out onto the patio. Around me are various friends from different times of my life. I'm totally relaxed and decide to stretch a bit as I begin moving through a short series of yoga asanas. Others around me join in, surprising me with their knowledge of Hatha yoga. Next to me, Steffany goes into dog pose. I stand up and walk down the hallway, towards the mud baths. There I meet my old friend Stacy, standing nude and covered with freshly-applied blue-gray mud from head-to-toe. She grins widely at me and I join her in muddiness.

Layers and layers and more layers of wakefulness. I recall at least a dozen times wherein I thought I'd woken, showered, dressed, and moved about the house; each time thinking "wow, I sure had a lot of layers of delusional wakings!"

As far as I know, I'm awake now.

I don't quite recall any of the dreams themselves, only the general form. I found myself feeling paralyzed -- I would feel myself moving, but my body wouldn't obey. Hyponogogic trance paralysis.

I actually woke around 7 -- or, rather, was woken, by a cheery kanon42 who couldn't sleep and didn't see any reason why I should. After some convincing, though, I managed to get her to turn off the light again, and we slept peacefully until 2.

It is a recurring dream, or at least a concept that has recured several times in my dreams.

I have parked the car at the base (or at least at the highest drivable point) of the mountain. We are about half an hour's drive north of Cape Town. It will be a long days walk to the top and back, but it is worth it, for reasons that are strongly felt but not explainable. from the top we will have a panoramic view over the whole of the Cape Peninsula.

I wake up, and I realise that there is no such mountain. I weep when I write this.

Two possible reasons for this dream.

My activites last night, the reasons why I was sleeping on Sunday afternoon: The Alien Safari party (ie trance rave) on Silverstroom strand. North of Cape Town, but at sea level. My chosen recreation, as opposed to my parents's hiking and mountaineering. did reach chemical heights that night, not that it was real.

My recuring desire and knowledge that for my own good, is should fly north and leave this place behind me. I rememer walking to the top of Crough Patrick, a large hill or small mountain in Ireland, and the wonderfull view from the top. I could leave Africa (or at least I tell myself that I can), but try as I might, it will never leave me.

In my dream, I look down at my hands and my fingernails are yellowed, and some have split down the middle. My nails look like the neglected toenails of very old people - gnarled, ragged, and thick. I decide I must not have been eating well - but I only drank a couple of white russians last night, and they were fine then, so how could this have happened to my nails so fast?

I started looking for an emery board to fix my nails, and then I woke up. The first thing I did was look at my hands. My nails are fine. There aren't even any hangnails.
We went back each night, standing around with our shovels, weary, disappointed.

Over and over it would rain so that we could not dig the body up.

Quickie, but a weird one. Now I don't remember much about it but it was about Fidel Castro, a right wing local (Spain) politician and me smoking some cigars coolly.

Nothing happened, but it was very relaxing. Mind you, it worried me about my (I though inexistent) political tendencies.

1:00 AM

We were cleaning my room, getting it prepared for when I would leave. Mom and Sharon were so sweet. Mom wrote several thank-you notes for me, and they were very well-written. When I got here, there was some controversy about the cathedral of learning versus CMU's comparable structure, which was taller, rotated, and had extremely more desirable lighting. I mentioned that we were rotating faster, but since we were near the top floor, perhaps our rotation was less due to the movement of the Earth. (I was wrong.) There was a gathering downstairs, where I met Frau Young (who did not seem at all surprised to see me) and my Grandma. Grandma gave me a box of ice cream to share with my roommate. She was talking about something like wine tasting tomorrow. I put the box of ice cream in the freezer, and played around with the ice-box structure inside. The door to the structure had the same texture as the ice that would build up inside the freezer, so it was almost undetectable. I then spent much time trying to read something on the box of ice cream, which action brought me to eventually wake up.

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