I dreamed I was going to ride horses at the ranch of an old family friend. Their kids weren't there and the ranch was actually a cluttered five story loft with no horses. "Regular saddle, please." "I haven't ridden a horse before! Once in my life!" The guy takes me upstairs to the fifth floor to find a riding helmet for me and proceeds to have wild sex with me. Halfway through I yell for his wife to come stop him. Afterwards I find her in the kitchen on the ground floor: "I warned you about him, didn't I? Christ you have no sense!" I wander out, somewhat confused, still not having ridden a horse.

Yay! The first remembered dream in weeks!

I found my long-lost pair of sunglasses.
This was funny in two ways:

• They weren't lost at all. In a slight episode of lucid dreaming, I checked the place where I usually keep them. Sure enough, I found another pair of sunglasses. Upon comparing them, I discovered that
• They mutated right in front of my eyes. The lenses of the first pair changed tint and transparency and grew. Tentatively, I tried my newly-mutated shades but soon found that they attempted to merge by fusing themselves to my face. Scary.