You think she's a sexual goddess
until she starts having issues.
It's really cute when she snarls
nasty freakazoid pet names in bed
or gives you a hand job under the dinner table
at the country club
during your parents' anniversary dinner,
but then she makes you a crown of barbed wire.
You laugh it off until one night
you wake up tied to the bed.
She insists you need stigmata.

Based on a friend's ex-girlfriend.

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