I liked the idea of coloured contact lenses, but the reality wasn't so hot. During a 4-for-the-price-of-one special offer at the optician's, I got three pairs with my standard clear ones in purple, turquoise and brown (my real eyes are green) and spent several weeks swanning around staring at people, to see if they'd notice. They did. The turquoise ones were such an unreal colour they made me look like some kind of alien wax figure: the word 'Barbie' was used, and after that they swiftly went into retirement. The brown ones, apparently, made me look exactly like my sister. That got rid of them. The purple ones were definitely the best of the bunch: but the hole for the pupil in the centre of the fake iris obviously didn't shrink and grow like the real one, which gave an odd effect in bright sunlight, as if I had two concentric irises. Interesting things if you wanna look weird, but don't expect them to resemble the real thing too closely..

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