"It was just a nightmare to try and plan anything with him," she continued after putting her glass back down onto its coaster. "If I would suggest a concert, he'd want to go to a movie. If I suggested a particular movie, he'd want to go to the bars. If I wanted to go out to the bars, he'd want to just hang out at home."

Was he just being contradictory?

"Not really. I think it had to be some kind of control issue for him. He had to be the one to decide where we'd go or what we'd do. Once I started letting him decide what we'd be doing together, he'd be decisive. And I just did the things I wanted to do on my own time and told him I had work to finish up that night."

Kind of like having to say, 'Not tonight, dear, I have a headache'?

"You know, I had that exact same thought the second or third time I tried it? But I didn't really care, not enough to feel guilty about it. I mean, he was a great guy and I liked being seen with him. And he was great in bed. But when I realized that he has the same control issues there that he did when we were going out, I knew things weren't going to improve."

So, would you call that a causal relationship?

She thought about this for a second. "No," she decided, "it wasn't even that. It was just causal sex."

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