I can handle bugs fairly well. I'm not generally afraid of them, though they seem to be pulling these little stunts lately to startle the hell out of me, causing me to develop a condition that I like to refer to as "bigassbugaphobia".

I guess the bug doesn't even have to be that big, it just has to appear that way when its wings are spread. (And yes, it has to have wings, or this really doesn't apply.) This happens to me, all the time:

Sittin' around, chillin', performing my rodent smoking device duties, when all of a sudden a big bug lands right on me, generally on my boob. Is my boob a bug magnet? Is that it? It doesn't scare me but it startles me and I generally jump and almost, to my dismay, let out of one of those utterly girly shrieks. Ugh.

I wonder how all these crazy bugs get into my house, anyway, considering this happens nine times out of ten while I'm sitting at my computer. There was also that time when an earwig ran out from beneath the control key and I nearly had a heart attack.

Maybe I should be concentrating on the bug infestation rather than the bigassbugaphobia.

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