Beyond a doubt, the most original rejection line I've ever heard.


I'd known John for about a year. He got me a job when I needed it, we'd been there for each other to talk to a few times, and I thought he was pretty cool. I knew that he is both a fur and a zoophile, but he also liked guys, didn't expect me to do 3somes with Lassie, and hey, he's cute.

We'd seen each other a few times. He was good to spend time with, could keep up a conversation, and was fun in bed. I wasn't sure if we were "going anywhere", in a relationship sense, but I was happy with things as they were.

We were enjoying that period of after-sex chatting when the clothes are back on, but nobody is in a hurry to leave. He was looking unhappy, and I asked him what was wrong.

He looked right at me and said "I'm sorry. I can't see you any more. You're the wrong species."

I calmly picked my jaw up from my lap and considered that statement for a moment, then said "Explain, please?"

He said, "I've been agonizing over it for a long time, and... I just can't care for you the way you want. It's not you! I couldn't care for anybody that way. Nobody human, at least." He then related, stammering a lot, how horrible humans are to each other, and this feeling he'd been struggling with for years that he wasn't meant to be a human. He always felt, inside, that he should be a dolphin.

After telling me that he was sorry about a thousand times, I stood up, hugged him, told him I would respect his wishes, and walked out.


After all, how can you respond to something like that?

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