Unsafe thoughts.
Not like 1984 Orwellian Thought Police kind of unsafe thoughts, but the kind that you know will get you into trouble one way or the other. You hate to harbor them, yet somehow it thrills you to the depths of your soul to think about them regardless of the consequences. Rather than having to find it, trouble follows you while you ponder these things, rolling them around your mind like a pencil between two fingers. You reassure yourself with small words like "I love trouble" and "I know what I'm doing" but of course you never fully realize the outcome of your impure mental meanderings until they come to fruition.

I'm thinking those kinds of thoughts right now, and I'm hoping they'll come true, if for no other reason than to engage my mind in another course, the tracks of which inevitably lead to brash, untamed, unruly, unsafe thoughts.

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