This dream I've been having after late nights of studying anthropology and eating apple pie.

It all starts out normally enough, I'm driving down the publicly funded highway system in my privately owned vehicle, on my way to the town council meeting. All of sudden I see a poor WWII veteran begging for pennies on the median. As I am independently wealthy (because I live under a free market system), I freely choose to donate a five dollar bill, adorned with Abraham Lincoln's face, to my noble countryman so he can buy a cup of coffee and a commemorative monument.

My 2.5 children are complaining of hunger, so I stop at a small, locally owned commercial enterprise, and order large helpings of baked beans and cheeseburgers. After we dispose of our paper napkins, plates, and dixie cups, we bundle into our air conditioned vehicle, 70% of us buckle up, and I fire up the cell phone.

As I pull my SUV into the parking lot of the small-town courthouse in a good, safe neighborhood, I check my 44 Magnum to make sure I am not neglecting my second amendment rights. I smile and wave as I see the democratically elected mayor standing in the courthouse doorway.

Suddenly, I am drafted.

It goes downhill from there.

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