I am not sure why it seemed truer to me, more real
than some other dust covered memento
. I often find objects in the apartment that seem to have some historical significance to someone, and this letter was one of those. It had been written to my roommate from a previous girlfriend, but it was not done.
It had been started, something interuppted her, and she had left it in this old paperback (The Heart is a Lonely Hunter
The note/letter was written on the back of a receipt for some clothes- was it mailed? Intended to be left as a reminder? - I couldn't tell. But I was finding it now, 6, maybe 10 months after they had broken up. And I could not get past it. Past the fact that it's incompletion, it's "halfness" made it somehow more real, more poignant. It reminded me of those pictures you see in Science textbooks of birds and other animals frozen in tar, wood sap or ice. Caught in motion, forever moving in some direction.
I wish you were here so I could read this to you. It reminds me of a teacher I had in high school. I wonder if you would mind me reading a whole book to you sometime or if you think that would be weird. I love it when you read poetry to me or hum a song to me you heard on the way to