Shane Warne is a top Aussie. He is also a massive pisstank yobbo with a beer gut who dyes his hair blonde and drives a red convertible. Warney has done some bad things. He once got paid 100 grand by Nicobate to give up durries for a year but he lit up heaps when he was pissed. Then he took money from some Indian bookmakers for pre-match information. He once smashed a camera cause a kiddy took a photo of his beer gut. Then he got toey on the phone and dirty-talked an English girly who wasn't his wife. However, all Australians agree that Warney can be excused for doing these things cause he spin bowls like a genius and makes England look completely shithouse. Warney could drink all our beer and then spew on our carpet and we wouldn't care as long as he keeps taking wickets. Warney is a top Aussie.

The contents of this writeup written by Grant(Nosedog) and can be found in its original form at Permission gained from Grant on 20 November, 2000 to reproduce the text on everything2. Many thanks
Warne is so all-encompassingly fat that when on tour in, for example India, he took with him crates of baked beans. Clearly tired by all the excess movement involved in representing your country at an international level, he ate rather more than he'd thought he would, and got Heinz to fly him out more beans . The man defies belief. But then spinners are always fat and lazy. Look at Phil Tufnell. He (Shane Warne) was, for some while, rated as the best bowler in the world. He has been displaced from that position by compatriot Glenn McGrath.

Update March 2002: Here's some content, too. His figures currently stand as follows: Updated July 2005: This is a terrible node. I'm correcting the statistics. Shane Warne is one the most important cricketers ever to have lived. He deserves better than this. Supersede me and I'll Ching you. We resuem our normal programming:


                      M    I  NO  Runs   HS     Ave     SR 100  50   Ct  St
Batting & Fielding   123   169   15   2518   99   16.35     55.52   0   10   275   29   107   0 
                      O      M     R    W    Ave   BBI    5  10    SR  Econ  5  10
Bowling            123 5739.4 14878 583  8/71  12/128  25.51  2.59  59.0 29  8


                      M    I  NO  Runs   HS     Ave     SR 100  50   Ct  St
Batting & Fielding  194   107   29   1018   55   13.05     72.04   0   1   60   13   80   0 
                      O      Balls     R    W    Best Ave   4w  5w    SR  Econ
Bowling            194   10642   7541   293   5/33      25.73   12   1   36.32  4.25    

He burst onto the international scene taking Mike Gatting's wicket with his first ball, the renowned ball from hell. Statistics source:

Shane Warne is a Victorian and Australian cricketer. Notably, Warne holds the record for scoring the most Test runs without ever scoring a century - 100 runs in an innings - falling short on 99 on one occasion. So he is quite useful as a lower-order batsman, but he is most famous for being the most prolific wicket-taker in Australian history and, for a brief period, the entire history of the game. He was the first man to pick up 700 Test wickets, amidst a perpetual race with Sri Lankan spinner Muttiah Muralitharan.

IMHO, Warne's off-field antics and controversies are not offset by his skills on the cricket pitch. The two are separate areas of his life, in my eyes, and must be treated as such: when talking about cricket, Warne is one of the greatest bowlers of all time; when talking about yobbos, Warne is one of the worst. Since the first writeup, Warne has been involved in more sex scandals and been through a divorce with his wife. He was also banned from the game for a year for taking an illegal diuretic which he claimed was "given to him by his mother". (The reason he was banned is that the diuretic could have been considered a masking agent.)

On field, we're bloody lucky to have had him bowl for Australia. His many years in the game have been legendary, from his (in)famous "Ball From Hell" to his plain psychological torture of batsmen the world over (yes, torture: there is a legend that says Daryl Cullinan sought therapy after Warne's brutal treatment). Warne is well known for his "flipper"; although he did not develop it himself, he used it with huge success, including his first wicket after returning to the game after surgery on his hand.

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