Section Five, Public Order Offence UK

If you are stopped and/or searched by the Police in the UK many, many times as indeed I have, you may well feel a bit peeved. If you articulate your frustration and annoyance by calling the Police Person EVERY SINGLE bad word and insult you can think of, as long as there isn't anybody in earshot or nearby (ie You and the Officer(s)) they can't do a damn thing about it. Firstly they'll say "You are in breach of section 5 of the Public Order Bill. Don't call me a fat bigoted simian fucking shit-licker again, please, or I'll arrest you" If you continue, even with a non-stop tirade of pure dredged filth, they'll arrest you. Then, when you go to court, you (or your Representative) will say "There was nobody else in earshot, and the Police are trained not to get upset when called nasty names.The Officers in question are wasting the courts and the taxpayers time"

The Magistrate will then berate the Officer(s) in question, asking why they are bringing spurious and petty non-offenses to court.

The Officer(s) will then go bright red, and look at you with intent to pepper spray you within an inch of your life next time you meet...

Mention it in the Car when you are driving to the Police Station and watch the Officer(s) smug self-satisfaction deflate rather shamefully. Just make sure there is no-one else around. Or you're stuffed.

Not a Legal Document. This works in the UK, but we haven't got gun crazy tazer wielding Police People like in the U.S. I wouldn't WHISPER anything other than "Yes Sir" and "No Sir" if I lived stateside...

Log in or registerto write something here or to contact authors.