Do you ever wish you were still back in primary school? Do you still remember the games you used to play at playtime and after school? Well I do (to both questions). The following is a description of various games that we used to play, and the adult variation that I believe should be encouraged today:

Kiss Tag
Kid’s Version:
Chase the girls around the school and if you caught them – kiss them.
Adult’s Version:
Chase women around the bar, and if you catch them - they shove their tongue down your throat.

You show me yours, I’ll show you mine
Kid’s Version:
Hide behind building/bushes and check out each other’s bits.
Adult’s Version:
When confronting a person of the opposite sex that you find attractive in a bar or on the street, tear one another’s clothes off and size one another up before even entering into a conversation.

Dodge Ball
Kid’s Version:
Team up and throw an incredibly hard basket or soccer ball at the other team, attempting to knock them down and make them cry.
Adult’s Version:
Team up and launch incredibly explosive devices such as grenades and mortars at the other team attempting to knock them down and make them die.

Good News
Kid’s Version:
Every morning you get up in front of the class and tell them something that happened in the weekend, or show them your new pet turtle for their approval.
Adult’s Version:
When ever you walk into a bar you are expected to relate to the patrons stories of your latest sexual exploits, or just flop out your wang/mams for their approval.

Bullrush
Kid’s Version:
Starting with one person in the middle, the entrie class runs to the other side of the field and have to be caught by the one in the middle. Every person caught helps catch the others, until the entire class is caught, and in the middle.
Adult’s Version:
Starting with one person in the middle, the entire bar/nightclub rushes at them in an attempt to get caught. Anyone caught gets taken to a back room and shagged senseless, whilst the others keep drinking and waiting for them to come out. Once they return, somewhat exhausted and spent, they catch the next person whose turn it is to be in the middle. Every person gets a turn at being caught until everybody has had a go.
Where the hell did that one come from?

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