Owner of Kraft Foods, Kraft Foods International, Miller Brewing Company, Philip Morris U.S.A. (makers of Marlboro, Virginia Slims, Benson & Hedges and many many many other cigarette brands) and Philip Morris International.

While you might have something to say about the evils of tobacco I would argue that Velveeta is by far their most heinous product.
Most people find it easy to deride and spit on a company like Phillip Morris, but they only do that because it's easy. The reality of the situation is that the people of Phillip Morris are working to make a difference.

Oh, I can see you spewing FUD about Phillip Morris being a huge, ruthless mutli-national corporation. Let me assuage that notion right now; Phillip Morris is no more a multi-national corporation then your Neighborhood Bakery. And just how willing is your bakery to help the misfortuned among us? Just between you and me, not very.

Phillip Morris, however, relishes in the opportunity to pick these poor castaways up from the rot they've been cast into. They are out, every-day, keeping children from smoking. They video tape it, too! It's legit! I wouldn'tve believed it myself, but then the kids got on camera and talked about why they don't smoke! It was incredible! I was beside myself... they must've gone to some trouble to keep those OTHER bloodthirsty cigarette companies off of 'em. You think those kids don't listen.... they do. They know smoking isn't "HIP"... like alcohol, it's to be enjoyed when your of age. But that isn't all....

While the executives are all out rescuing ghetto kids from themselves, there are these lonely women!! These poor wretched creatures... thrown away by a society that worships youth. Well Phillip Morris ain't gonna let that happen!!!!!! They send guys out with food and spirit. This one guy.... my god... they sent a camera crew with him. He SANG old Italian love songs to her! She was ecstatic! He was too! My GOD it was outstanding! This poor wretch gave him a beaming smile... her meaningless existence totally forgotten.

And don't get me started about starvation! Phillip Morris is all over that one. No kids gonna go hungry while Phillip Morris is on watch, thats for DAMN sure.

I don't know about you, but I've got my checkbook out right now... and a hearty hand-shake ready!

Here's to YOU Phillip Morris!

Jests id1984:

"Let me assuage that notion right now; Phillip Morris is no more a multi-national corporation then your Neighborhood Bakery."

Says Philip Morris' own web site (http://www.philipmorris.com/Home.asp):

"With products for sale in over 175 markets worldwide, Philip Morris International manages the world's leading international cigarette business."

As for them stopping children from smoking, they give away free cigarettes to children as young as 10 years old in the countries that have not yet stopped them from doing it. They go as far as they legally can to get as many children to start smoking as they can, using whatever method they can get away with in any particular country.

In the United States, their specific marketing method consists of projecting the image of "Saint Philip Morris", the company that sponsors Meals on Wheels (I'm sure they make an annual tax-deductable donation to it, but they certainly do not run the program). The other, and more important part of their marketing, is to project smoking as a sophisticated activity.

I have written another node about their deceptive get-the-kids-to-smoke ads. Let me add to it that nowhere in their ads do they ever mention any negative effects smoking has on smokers' health, particularly young smokers' health: No mention of cancer, emphysema, bronchitis, wrinkles, dry skin, cough, etc, etc, etc. No mention of cigarette smoke containing Zyklon B and other goodies. Only the mention of them working on preventing kids from smoking (thus, offering the kids a challenge). Does it work? You bet! According to recent US Government statistics, 3,000 (three thousand) Americans under the age of 18 start smoking EVERY SINGLE DAY!

That is 3,000 new life-time customers for cigarette companies every day in the US alone. As to which of the cigarette companies gets to keep most of these customers for itself, here's another quote from Philip Morris' web site:

"Philip Morris U.S.A. is the nation's leading cigarette manufacturer."

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