Mongolian Death Flu is your generic neighborhood multi-symptomatic, come-out-of-nowhere, lay-waste-to-all-surrounding, and return-next-week-to-do-the-same thing fall/winter cold that seems to be particularly fond of college campuses and office buildings, where people are crowded enough they can't escape one another. The term seems also to be most common in these places where this weekly plague is most often found.

  • If you have a disease that just won't diagnose right
  • If your symptoms change daily from "stomach flu" to "laryngitis"
  • If your symptoms change immediately after you've gotten medication for the old ones
  • If half your classmates/officemates are out sick with it too
  • If you just went from 0-dead in under 60 seconds
these are all symptoms of the Mongolian Death Flu.

Of course the usual advice applies: rest, drink water, eat chicken soup, see a doctor for a REAL diagnosis in case it's something serious or treatable, all apply to this "ailment" as well. And if someone you know has it, comfort them and be VERY sympathetic--but from afar--the Death Flu is nothing to be taken lightly, even if it doesn't exist.

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