Happy birthday Henry Kissinger and Hubert H. Humphrey.

Rolled into bed last night after a crap night on the dance floor (bearing a crap night on the dance floor beats a good night most other places) and woke up this morning feeling like shit and not smelling much better. Unfortunately I've got a full days work to do...

Or rather, I've got a full days work I should be doing. I'll probably node instead.

If you've got any votes left, vote for 100 Most Shocking Moments in Rock 'N' Roll by czeano. It rocks. Literally.

My first entry in the day log.

Today I'm struggling with what to do with my life. I have a good job - I'm a software engineer - but the company's future isn't certain. Not that there aren't lots of other companies out there, and I've done consulting in the past. But I've been thinking lately that I want to go to college and get my degree. I'd like to go for a Masters in Computer Science.

Maybe some background is needed. I'm pretty unusual - 19 years of age and I've been working in software development full time most of the time since before I turned 14. (Made possbile only by the wonders of homeschooling!) The company I work for now has sent me all over the country to consult for our clients. I do pretty well for myself to say the least.

But I sometimes feel like I should head to college and get a formal education and a degree. Up to this point I've taught myself everything I know - with the help of lots and lots of books; my parents of course; and Phil Wood, who taught me so much about math, computers, working with metal in his machine shop, history, and life in general.

So my dillema is: should I spend 4 or 5 years attending a university, or should I keep working and teaching myself what I can? My misgivings about going to college are that I really don't know how much the things I learn there will help me with my job and in life. If I can spend those years doing more on my own, then perhaps that's the right thing to do. But, OTOH, if I don't go to college now, I probably never will be able to.

What to do... guess I'll just keep on noding for now...

root@badtz simonc# date
Sun May 27 14:52:17 EST 2001

Today I was up early to walk the dogs around the cafe strip of Kingston and to return the DVDs from last night (Charlie's Angels and some Pierce Brosnan flick we never got around to watching. Looked like Dances With Wolves from the slick). Then to the supermarket for grocery shopping which is a chore that I love. I grab a basket and slowly wheel my way around, letting a creative part of my brain just roll over with possibilities for delicious meals. Gemma hates the supermarket, which is absolutely fine with me.

Then I thought I'd take a Sunday drive around my home city of Canberra. Although I've lived here for two years, I've been travelling a lot and really haven't had much of a chance to look around. I put the two dogs in the back seat and took off, winter sun warming my face through the windscreen. We drove up to the Defence Department and stood at the enormous obelisk, looking up Consitution Avenue to the new Parliament House. The monument was a gesture to the US Armed Forces at the conclusion of WW2, thanking them for their support in the Pacific Theatre.

The dogs and I then drove to the Old Parliament House (now the National Portrait Gallery), where they had a great time running around some of the oldest rose bushes in the country and sniffing the copious duck shit, all round the fountains. A lone guy was blasting it back into the pools, but it must be a full-time job for him!

Then we drove around Mitchell and discovered the National War Memorial Science and Technology Annex, which I never knew existed, and then the Kamberra Wine Centre, a kind of centre of excellence for the local wine industry (ditto).

Home now, Gemma is asleep and I'm enjoying a small tub of Baskin Robbins mint choc chip ice cream, not to mention E2...

I never thought graduating from college would effect me quite like this.

And yet, on Thursday night as I walked back to my car from taking my very last final exam at Long Beach State, I was crying. I cried all the way back to Disneyland, where I had left a friend who was visiting from Toronto. I found him in Tomorrowland, hustled over to Splash Mountain, and got into a log filled with gorgeous boys just as the park was closing. Not a bad way to end the day, but the crying thing is still haunting me.

Earlier in the week I had spoken to one of my closest friends, a girl named Marisa that I have known since high school. We talked about college, graduation, and how we both have changed so much over the past six years. In the course of conversation, I discovered just how much those years had meant to me. We talked about the golden age of youth, and whether or not it even exists. I still haven't made any conclusions, but I'm also very afraid inside that all the fun I've been having these past few years is going to slowly fade into the more mundane routine of life more commonly associated with adulthood.

I really don't think I'm ready for that just yet.

I'm sorry, but I'm having too much fun. The past few years have changed me completely, inside to outside. How can I just switch into grown-up mode? I don't want this adventurous life to end just yet. And what all this boils down to is that on the one day when I should be rejoicing that I've finally finished school...I'm crying...

This isn't what I expected at all.

nighthowl:~$ ddate
Today is Boomtime, the 1st day of Confusion in the YOLD 3167

10:31

I just woke up...

Today's Project: Some gaming to preserve my sanity.

For some reason, every time I'm in Oulu over the weekend they're showing Formula 1 and all interesting TV programs are pushed to the late evening...

Well, I'm not complaining, even when I'm not exactly a racing fan. =)

13:21

My plan was this: I downloaded both Windows Media Player 7 and Winamp (my Win98 side has just an old version of WMP that came with 98SE). I install WMP7.1, and let it associate with whatever it wants. I then install Winamp, and let it associate with everything it wants.

Surprise!

I had downloaded the 9-meg WMP7.1 earlier at work, and burned it on CD-R... but when I clicked it, it just asked me something garbagefully (random high-bit characters). <HUMOR topic="WaR3z" lameness="99%">I don't think the WMP download page mentioned anything about Chinese? Or maybe it printed it in Russian, noticing it was being installed from CD-R?</HUMOR>

Well, at least it gave me a reason to see what Windows Update has to offer. Interestingly enough, it mentioned that there was an IDE-related patch; maybe that will make this machine boot to Win98 a bit faster, because I think it is an IDE-bus-related problem.

Oh, BTW, who the heck at MS thought that updates should be done with a web browser? I wanted to get IE security updates while I was at it, but apparently it won't be possible if I want to install something else...

I'll take apt or Red Carpet any day, thank you. =)

20:18

Project Amusement: Seeking The New Limits of Dissatisfaction™

Okay, guess how well the games played.

Not too well. Even after the patch.

Windows Media Player 7 is, uh... not strategically differnent from what I had. Skinnable, but it just adds a huge button to the other corner of the screen. Or something.

I encoded the longest MPEG/VCD clips I've done so far: two segments from MTV3's "Far Out" program - "Reconstruction of escape to the West" in Berlin and "Finnish Eurovision song contest entry" in Copenhagen - these two were just about the funniest tricks in the whole show...

Also tried the Windoze Ogg Vorbis encoder. Works nicely. (I encoded the "entry" mentioned above... Some of the lyrics: "We come frome from Finland / We have this great song / It's so fucking boring, / It goes on and on, on and on, ..." =)

Played MechWarrior 4. had severe problems with controls, again. But the bright side: I noticed that aiming was much easier when I used external view.

BTW, the game has one serious flaw: If I'm using MW2/MW3 style weapon selection (pick weapon or group), it just won't indicate what weapon I've selected. I guess MW4-style "press button, all Weapons in the Group shall Sing" is easier...

Encoding took a lot of time and I didn't play much of games today. Not really fun. But the video clips were enought to make me more happy.

::...sings "...we didn't get points, Wooonndeeeer whyyyyyy?!?"::

23:16

Kluged Vocoditor to support Winamp a bit better... (In other words, it uppercasifies all tags it reads. =)


Other day logs o' mine...

Noded today by y.t.: Death Rally The Creation

It's quite unnerving when a long familiar room becomes something very different.

We are currently remodeling our bathroom, and it's been stripped to, and beyond the very walls. Only the studs remain with various bits and pieces of drywall adhering, along with wires, pipes, and spiderwebs. (Spiderwebs inside a wall? Very optimistic bugs, or something I'm better off not knowing?) The floor is two different shades of concrete, one where the old bathtub has been removed, another where the linoleum has been taken up. The sink is gone, as is the medicine cabinet. Alone in the bathroom, the toilet occupies its accustomed corner.

It feels different… The ceiling is higher because it's been ripped out. The room is larger because so much formerly in it has been removed. And how often do you see the studs and systems in a living house? Only in a house under construction, or long abandoned do you see rooms like this. Every time I walk into it, I get this weird feeling; this is not my house.

I don't live like I used to. When I was 14 I didn't smoke, rarely cussed, couldn't write a short story to save my life, didn't drink coffee, didn't have a job, wasn't independent, thought for myself with mild results, didn't drive, didn't pay taxes, didn't have debts, didn't date, didn't worry about bills, didn't have sex, didn't pray, didn't consider the "big picture", didn't read, didn't listen to music with an ear for appreciation, didn't socialize, didn't go to parties, didn't create, didn't stay up all night, didn't study, didn't want to be a father or be married... there's a lot of things I didn't do when I was younger that I find myself embroiled in now.

Getting closer to thirty is a prime reason for self introspection. I've changed a lot over the years. A whole lot. Things that didn't even enter my mind when I was a kid prey on my mind on an almost daily basis now. The things I think about these days are the things that everyone told me I'd have plenty of time to focus on later in my life. Well, now it's later and I'm thinking about these things and you know what? I wish I didn't have to think about them. And I don't have to think about them. But I do.

I turn 28 in two days (but who's counting?). I have a friend, Ed, who is 10 years older than me almost to the day (May 28th). He's dating a 19-year-old girl who works as a stripper. On a weekly basis she rips his heart out and then hands him the superglue so that he can repair it on his own. It's an ugly cycle for him, but he loves the evil bitch. What can I do? Nevermind. This isn't about him. The point is: what will I be faced with when I'm his age? What's going to be dogging my heels when I take another step closer to forty, middle age? I like to think that my own mid-life crisis won't be as traumatic as his, but I'm for shit when it comes to seeing my own personal future. Seeing a train wreck before it happens is all well and good when you're on the outside, but it's a nifty trick when you're in the middle of it.

I don't think I'll be a living train wreck when I'm 38. At least, I pray to God I won't be.
But I wonder....

All in all I'd have to say that my life has been pretty interesting up to this point. Not exactly movie-of-the-week kind of interesting, but notable in an esoteric kind of way. All my experiences up till now have made me into who I am and I'm a pretty good guy, all things considered. I find murder repugnant, I haven't committed any sexual crimes that I know of, I don't drink alcohol, I don't use drugs, I don't lie or steal or fight or all kinds of things that many of my peers do on a regular basis. I'm fairly responsible (though my bill collectors would have you think otherwise) and I've definitely found my spiritual "center."

Some things are lacking, however. I keep getting told by so many people that I'd be one hell of a good husband and father. That's good to know, I suppose, other people's opinions being what they are. But if it's so true, if I'm such a good catch, how come I'm still single? How come I still feel so alone in this world? At 28? Even at 14, when thinking about such things seemed foreign to me, I figured it would be a given for me to have a family by the time I turned 25 or something close to it.

One thing at a time, I guess. My career is finally starting to move in the direction I'd hoped it would- I landed a job as a graphic and web designer last week and the work I've done has surprised even me. I suppose that once my career is firmly established and I've got my ducks all in a row, I can move on to the marriage thing. But that takes the input of another human being, a woman. What is it that I'm lacking, besides finanacial success, that keeps me single at 28? I'm not ugly. I'm not perverted or mentally unstable. I'm not cruel or unfair or unloving. One would think that I would be well on my way to being a family man by now, right?

I dunno. Maybe this self introspection thing is turning into a whining session. I should probably stop here and take it for granted that when I'm 56 I'll be asking myself a whole new set of questions I'm not even thinking of right now.

Up at 6 am. Again. I've got this new job, and it's great and all. I mean, I bascially get paid to sit in front of a computer with a great internet connection and node/chat/surf all day long. Granted, I'm not paid much, but it's good.

The problem is that this week I've been adding hours on for people who aren't able to make it and it's wearing me down. Fortunately I got almost seven hours of sleep last night, but the night before that it was 2 and the night before that 4 hours. On a positive note, all this time at work allowed me to achieve my first ching yesterday. Funny that.

The whole thing started out with filling a nodeshell, which was essentially a biography. In order to do this biography, a lot of background information on several things was required. After making many, many hard links, I discovered that there was a lot of information needed. So I kept noding. But back to today. Nothing special as of yet. Still waiting on my new Powerbook Titanium. Of course it won't come today, being Sunday, and not tomorrow, as it is Memorial Day in the United States. That doesn't keep me from obsessing about it.

Commuting: I have to drive 50 minutes here to the school (where I'm working for the summer) across one of the most idiotic things known to man. The New Orleans Causeway. Seriously, who builds a 24 mile long bridge across the middle of a lake? I've been having these odd thoughts while driving on it lately, like what falling over in the car would be like.

More substantial daylog-type stuff later if any happens. (doubtful)


Okay, I've been noding around a little bit, and up came a link for MS Linux. Okay, that was a funny page, but it got me interested.
<rant> Geek that I fancy myself to be, I have strangely not read anything on Windows XP up until today. Well now I read their page. I am so pissed off.

I mean, it's just amazing, the sheer audacity of some of the shit they write on that page? It brings two questions to my mind:

  1. Who are they trying to fool?
  2. Are they succeeding?
It's really awful. With all these 'new' features, it really is starting to look like Linux. And they make all of these startling admissions in their zeal to promote their new product. "Now stable," etc...

And the cd-burning speed bullshit. I'm so damn sick of marketing bullshit from everyone. "Records cd's 700% faster than in Win98." Well, yeah, sure, if you go with Windows Media Player's inept 2x recording of songs. Please. The really sad thing is that the fine print about this is only on one of the, perhaps, three pages which say it. /me sighs. Oh well. Now I keep wondering, "Will I end up buying the upgrade just to try and keep current so I can help my family/friends/etc...?" </rant>

Oh man. I'm writing a day log and listening to Tom Waits. Something must be seriously wrong.

To explain : I have a long history of tortured, screwed-up relationships. This was followed by a year of single-dom in which I went crazy, dropped everything and moved to a new city.

Eventually, everything settled down a bit, and I settled into a cosy relationship with a really sweet girl who I'd been friends with for a while. Yesterday, by mutual consent, we agreed that while we loved each other, that something was missing. The overwhelming passion and desire to be with each other wasn't there. We were by no means the centre of each other's universe. Neither of us felt a massive leap in the base of our stomachs when the other walked into the room.

Both of us are young and stupid enough to believe that passionate, romantic love can be found and kept. Or that even if it can't, it's still worth searching for.

I had been really worried all day, because I knew it had to be done. I was terrified that she'd cry, be bitter, hit me, hate me. I was even more scared that she'd talk me into staying. Ironically, she had spent all day Saturday feeling exactly the same way.

The relief of not having to spend the night being a bastard completely overwhelmed any sadness at the end of a relationship. We talked for a couple of hours, hugged, kissed one last time and went our separate ways. I went straight to the pub and got drunk with some friends. I spent a night in a drunken haze, expounding on half-baked theories about the role of pop music in society (coming soon : A Defence Of Pop). It was all good. The world seemed bright and happy.

I deliberately had a good time last night. Because I knew I'd wake up today, and only be able to think one thing.

What now?

Somebody once accused me of constantly needing a woman to look after me. It really pissed me off when I heard that. Because it's absolutely true.

I'm no good by myself. For me solitude is more claustrophobic than the most stifling relationships. I'm always intensely aware that I'm single at every moment. I feel like I radiate sadness. I get embarrassed when I buy single servings of anything at the supermarket. I prowl nightclubs like a panther (albeit a drunk panther with arthritis), unashamedly hungry and looking for meat. Then I feel stupid and sit in a corner for the night. I just really, really suck at it.

But I have learned the hard way not to let myself be rushed into anything. I'm not going to hurl myself at the first woman to not be repulsed by me. I'm going to bide my time. And maybe I'll be better at it this time. I'm much more balanced now, and I feel like I have less to prove to the world.

Ah, I think I'll be okay. I have a few months of crushing loneliness, intermittently sprinkled with tragi-comic sex. And then someday, I'll find myself back in the old place again, complaining to my friends how the new girlfriend is driving me crazy.

Who knows, maybe I'll even make it to that point without writing any more daylogs. Just maybe....

_________________________________________________________
The International Herald Tribune (www.iht.com)
_________________________________________________________
No new headlines on Sunday.


_________________________________________________________
BBC Online (www.bbc.co.uk)
_________________________________________________________
Police on alert after Oldham riot
Extra police officers are patrolling the streets of Oldham after a night of violence between hundreds of Asian youths and police.

US urges Arafat to stop attacks
A US envoy presses Palestinian leader Yasser Arafat to stop attacks by militants, following two car bomb blasts in Jerusalem.

Schumacher masters Monaco
Michael Schumacher heads a superb Ferrari one-two at the Monaco Grand Prix, but David Coulthard settles for fifth.

Labour chases crime barons
Home Secretary Jack Straw unveils Labour's plans to seize the assets of crime barons - but the policies come under fire from the Tories.


_________________________________________________________
The New York Times (www.nytimes.com)
_________________________________________________________
Congress approves tax cuts, with rebates this summer
Congress gave final approval to a $1.35 trillion tax cut, voting to reduce all income tax rates over the next five years.

Stressed out? Bad knee? Try a sip of these juices
Big companies like Coca-Cola and Procter & Gamble have begun embellishing their products with herbal remedies that are popular, but largely unproven.

As others abandon plains, Indians and bison come back
As the nearly all-white counties of the Great Plains empty out, American Indians are coming home.

Document erases doubts about a McVeigh witness
The missing document, known as a lead sheet, was one of about 4,000 pages of information turned over to lawyers for Timothy J. McVeigh and Terry L. Nichols in recent weeks after the Federal Bureau of Investigation sought to close down its case in preparation for the execution of Mr. McVeigh.


_________________________________________________________
China Daily (www.chinadaily.com.cn)
_________________________________________________________
Reuter Poll: Beijing will win 2008 Olympic bid
Beijing will win July's International Olympic Committee (IOC) vote to stage the 2008 Olympic Games, according to a Reuters poll of leading sports journalists.

Macedonia to cut ties with Taiwan
Macedonia is to suspend "diplomatic ties" with Taiwan more than two years after switching recognition from Beijing to Taipei, the "foreign ministry" in Taipei announced Sunday.

Chemical spill in southern China injures 90
A chemical spill at a closed dye factory in China's southern province of Guangdong injured 90 people after they inhaled toxic fumes.

Philippine gunmen seize 20 on resort island
Gunmen believed to be Muslim rebels seized 20 people on Sunday including three American tourists in a dawn raid on a resort in the southern Philippines, government officials said.

Senior bank official wanted on graft charge
A former director of the Bank of China's branch in the southern island province of Hainan is being sought by police for alleged graft, state media reported Sunday.


_________________________________________________________
Panapress (www.panapress.com)
_________________________________________________________
Namibian orphan, cancer patient, needs help
Namibia Albinos Association (NAA) is appealing to public-spirited individuals and organisations to assist one of its members, Mesag Gwaangoya, 20, an orphan, suffering from skin cancer.

Chissano to step down in 2004
At a time when several African leaders are fiddling with their countries constitutions to cling to power, Mozambican President Joaquim Chissano insists he will stand down when his current term runs out in 2004.

Ugandan press on underpinnings of Powell's trip
The local press in Uganda was this week into speculations on the undeclared aspects of a four- country tour embarked upon by US Secretary of State Colin Powell.

Zimbabwe speaks back after Powell's attacks
Zimbabwe reacted angrily at the weekend to criticisms from US Secretary of State Colin Powell, that President Robert Mugabe was undemocratically clinging to power.


_________________________________________________________
The Moscow Times (www.themoscowtimes.com)
_________________________________________________________
No new headlines.
Nobody asked me, and it's not my place to say anything, but it can only be thought so many times before it needs to be said.

Ordinarily I read all the daylogs and then spout off some of my own gibberish. Today I feel like responding directly to NightShadow, and I suppose I see no reason not to. I just want to say (before I go off into my own self centered zone) that your 38 year old friend is probably playing with an immature emotional wreck, which cannot possibly be a good pairing for his mature emotional wreck. It is also probably never a good idea to date someone who cannot drink legally in the 48 contiguous states if you are old enough to be his/her parent. Just a thought. As far as where is your soulmate... well, those who are good catches are generally caught. The fact that you refer to a 19 year old stripper dating a 38 year old an evil bitch and saying that you have bill collectors calling you on the phone would direct me to believe otherwise. Maybe there are things you need to work out that you haven't really become aware of, even though you left a trail of clues for those that might date you and eventually bear your children.


In all fairness here's my gripe and the invitation for the stone bearers to throw at my glass house. I'm still working along/through/around my bipolar disorder and trying to not be a total flake. I'm trying to learn to socialize with people without either overdoing it or standing in the corner and not saying anything. I still feel weird, sometimes a little lethargic, other times a little wired. My brain is not so much on overdrive anymore, which is a good thing - but the lowering of my anxiety level has also raised my weight on the scales by about 20 lbs. I'm trying to exercise regularly and eat a little better - laying off the chocolate and taco bell. I'm still not there. But I'm climbing. And though I've had people tell me I'd be a wonderful (fill in the blank), I'm becoming more and more aware that I won't be ready to be a wonderful whatever until I'm done with the ascent to being morally, socially, and ethically responsible. Baa ram ewe, to thine own self be true.

05/27/2001

Not sure where to begin. I slept 11 hours last night. I only get 5 hours or so sleep during the week. I leave at 5:00 a.m. and get home late in the afternoon. After a brief relaxation I try to accomplish as much as I can before eating, bed and starting all over again.

I spent some time this morning just staring at the keyboards. I needed to finish this song but my inspiration is as finicky as a house cat these days. So realizing that music wasn't going to be written, I checked my email accounts and retired to the den for some coffee and news. You must realize by now that my life is as exciting as yours is.

I finally pulled myself off the couch to go fill my truck and get a wash. We have had an invasion of huge moths here in Texas. Every morning I run into their attack forces attempting to pulverize my truck in a failed endeavor to distract me so they can gain control of my brain stem. It seems that either there real stupid or very brave as their squadrons' attack in waves of destruction. By the time I arrive at work, there is only 50% visibility through the windshield. If their purpose was to disable my visibility, they have succeeded, but if there were surreptitious motives, they have yet to succeed. So after sitting trough the "deluxe" car wash, there are still the very noticeable remains of the suicidal moths. At least some remains were washed away, but it looks like manual rinsing before completely finding my full plane of view through the glass. So I wandered into the station, picked up some beer, wrote a check for 60 bucks for both tanks on my truck, and left.

Once I arrived back home, I watched a special on MSNBC about a couple that had their baby stolen. Naturally the police suspected them and went as far as fabricating evidence to try to convict them. What happened to the world? When did I miss the destruction of society and values? It must have been one of those fun weekends at the lake lucking out and not killing myself on water skis and avoiding the unseen dangers lurking below.

Now I've just come in from power spraying the pool deck. Two and a half hours shooting 2000 P.S.I. water at concrete and coping. I went without a shirt, as the heat was unbearable. Did I get sun? I won't know until I hit the shower and feel the pain from the hot water washing over scorched areas of my body. Happy happy joy joy. Sometimes my thinking ahead process is disabled for brief periods of time causing emotional and physical pain. Will I ever learn? Only time holds the answer.

Now I know I should have been in the attic replacing the cat5 cable for our Ethernet network, but now I think I'm going to call it a day and start sipping on some beer. My back hurts form bending over spraying, my left foot hurts from accidentally shooting it with the power sprayer and I stink.

Oh, one more thing. To top off the day, my mom calls. Seems I forgot to call her on mothers' day. Of course I did talk to her the day before, but as mothers are so astute to point out your absentmindedness and subconsciously implanting feelings of guilt and shame, it was to no avail telling her I'm sorry. So I talked and took my licks.

I'm off for a shower, beer and a good movie. I hope you had a wonderful Saturday.

TC

P.S. NightShadow You sound like you have a strong grasp on your reality. That's strength in the selection of where you want to be later in life. If you have doubts about your direction, start planning now and I believe you will achieve your goal.

P.S.S. Oh, its Sunday already? Hope you had a happy Sunday also.

Hehe, today was fun, my sister attempted to hit me and my dog saw and got incredibly angry, then I started screaming for help and my dog got even angrier and my sister was soon screaming for me to stop it! Hahahaha! Take out dinners rule, since I have it every night and my friends can guess where I'm ordering from. No work, no school, just completely slept in. Watched a couple of shows on tv. There was a really good Biography on Gerard Depardieu, one of my favorite actors, strangely it wasn't done by A&E. My little sister is being a freak and making sounds outside as she rides her blue bike in a pink dress and rain boots. I swear she's not related to me!

I'm going to this sleepover party today though I'm 18 years old. But I'm not going to be sleeping over. I was really hoping that my friend's little sister would be there, she's 14 and I always freak her out which amuses me so much. But her little sister heard that I was going to be going over to their house today so she made plans to go out so she wouldn't have to confront me. When I'm on the phone with her sister I can always hear her screaming in the background because somehow I disturb her.

Honestly though, I think she's really funny, if not a bit odd, she just says things that come out of nowhere and she just got a hair cut. A mohawk, well it's supposed to be a mohawk but it's short and she gels it back so it's more of an inverse mullet. She knows I call it that and gets angry about it and don't ever tell her that you don't like Bif Naked, I think that's how you spell it. She'll completely go into a rage! Haha but I continue laughing as she starts having a nervous break down. I don't think I'm a horribly mean person I'm just being honest.

The people that are going to be at the party are so much different from my actual friends that I grew up with. I don't know if they can handle me for more than 12 hours without screaming or something. hehehe. Going to rent a movie to watch too, I hope it's not a chick flick, but knowing them it probably will be. Sigh!

Well, off to the party, no alcohol so I'm going to bring 2 bottles of coke, 1 Dr. Pepper, and 1 Sprite. Heheheh Coke for myself! Lalalala, I'm not a coke addict!

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