Litany Before Election
by Samuel Hoffenstein

Oh, Lord, Who knowest the human heart,
(A thousand other things apart)
Whose constant purpose is the good
Of all the human brotherhood --
Look down (accept this humble rhyme)
And guard us in election-time!

Oh, let the people vote for Biggs,
And not for Jiggs, or Squiggs, or Riggs,
Or Kelly, Cohen, Bing or Brown,
Or Twohey, Thompson, Tubbs or Towne!
When sorrow has no more surprise,
And stars look down like Borgia's eyes;
When hope and hair and teeth are gone,
And trucks and I awake the dawn,
How good, in this abyss of care
To know that Biggs is in the chair!

We do so much, perforce, by rote,
And often know not how we vote;
We stumble through the dark below,
But Thou canst see what way to go --
Thy Castle on the Upper Rhine
Commands a prospect extra fine --
So lend Thy vision to our souls,
And leave it with us at the polls,
That we may see the name of Biggs,
And not of Jiggs, or Squiggs, or Riggs.

With Biggs elected, what are then
The ninety million plagues of men?
What wretch, who would not be content
With Biggs as Mayor or President? --
Whose heart would break at last, if Brown
Achieved the goal, or Tubbs or Towne.
This troubled world would be so bright
If people did but vote aright;
Would be so free of grief and sin
If only men like Biggs were in;
If men like Biggs were Coroner,
Or Alderman, or Treasurer.

So, Lord, Who missest not a chance
To make the world like Paris, France;
Whose constant purpose is the good
Of all the human brotherhood,
When next election comes to town
(The view is excellent) look down,
Erase the names of Squiggs and Jiggs
And cast a million votes for Biggs!

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