i taste you in strawberries
smell you on t-shirts you never wore
feel you in late nights
quick bursts of chest pain
that hurt and then leave,
like you

i hear you in songs
that we never listened to together
because we never had that in common

i miss you in spots
we never stood because
we didn't leave the bedroom much
and it wasn't that we
were using each other
but that we were both lovers,
and lovers first

i get you in small spaces, quick paces
strange quiet fits that patiently
wait for attention

like me

i see you
in fleeting daydreams of
what if he forgave me and decided
we were better than
the trip i couldn't take back
this (what nico said)

when you said you
didn't regret any of it

and i said...

(what i could to hurt you)

i lied.