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Time: Tue, 18 Jul 2000 00:03:47 GMT
Everything server: Apache/1.3.9 (Unix) Debian/GNU mod_perl/1.21_03-dev
Number of nodes: 614407 (1451 new since July 17, 2000)
Number of users: 16925 (27 new since July 17, 2000)
Number of links: 2437281 (20137 new since July 17, 2000)

Node to user ratio: 36.302 nodes per user
Link to node ratio: 3.967 links per node
Link to user ratio: 144.005 links per user

New Nodes: [Why is zero plural?] [mammagamma bomb] [Who is Sci Fi?] [To Celia] [When I Was One-and-Twenty] [names for groups of animals] [E2 nuke request] [an e-mail address is NOT a website!] [women want me when I'm taken] [Reality-based television] [olive] [LISP for UNIX] [Why is zero plural?] [Florida Everything Get-Together II Carpool] [women want me when I'm taken]

Users Online (44): [sensei] [dannye] [Deborah909] [N-Wing] [ModernAngel] [Lord Brawl] [Dis] [ShadowNode] [dragoon] [Stride] [7Ghent] [birdonmyshoulder*] [renster] [whizkid] [baffo] [Ereneta] [pealco] [Enzondio] [Jeeves] [dwyn] [ccunning] [Luquid] [Citizen Aim] [ithron] [Pyro] [sakico] [no comply] [TaintedTex] [spaceman_spiff] [tribbel] [ifeeldizzy] [Muke] [other90percent] [humanure] [sarahh] [Iconoplast] [Mike626] [jimbeam] [continuity] [Dr. Plaid] [Ahab] [purpusful] [Wuukiee] [nsanch]

JeffMagnus node count: 3851 (1 new since July 17, 2000)
JeffMagnus experience: 7651 (100 more since July 17, 2000)
JeffMagnus experience to node ratio: 1.987 XP per node
JeffMagnus nodeshare: 0.627%
JeffMagnus node of the day: Microsoft

Everyone, everything has.. a breaking point. I guess it isn't set in stone, it might vary depending on any number of conditions, emotional or physical.. but there will always be that point where you just can't take something anymore. I can't take the head games, the mindfucks, anymore. Actually, that's not true, I can and probably will take them for quite some time yet.. but I don't want to, I just will. I don't know what else to do.

How do you break away from everything all at once without destroying any of the things, people, that hold you? I just want to go, away, from everyone and everything that I know here. Everyone in this house needs to have more of a life for themselves, I can't be so intwined, I can't be such a large portion of any of this. I could be, but I won't last much longer if I am.. indecision. Everyone is so wrought with indecision.

I love my life, never the less, the way that these sporadic moments of pure bliss just happen along every so often. I just wish they weren't so few amidst a bunch of crap.

I know what I need. A road trip, a move, a big change, a very big change. Change frightens me, but it is necessary, especially now. I don't know how it will happen, if it will work out, but there's got to be more than this constant mess of bullshit I seem to be stuck in.
14:27 EET

I woke up at 11:40, having set my Nokia 3210 to wake me up at 10:00. What happened? Maybe the volume was too low? Not that me being late wouldn't matter much, since there isn't much work to do this week.

Got to the office at 12:30. It's a madhouse here at the moment, due to all the employees having a cleaning day. It started as two of us moved from one room to another, after which one of the bosses decided it would be a good day for taking out the trash. I've pretty much done my part cleaned my desk up, which means throwing approximately 150 empty CD-R covers into a cardboard box. And that's as much I'll be doing today.
I'm actually a bit pissed off at my boss at the moment. He promised I'd get to move into the room those two guys just left from, but now he's taking his words back. The place my desk is currently at simply sucks, apart from the great ventilation. The other room would've had a great view from the window, at the moment I am looking at a wall. Maybe I'll bring some nice anime poster here.

Btw, I was just wondering.. Do all the Linux fanatics and other "1337" people hate Dreamcast since it uses Windows CE?


Today's Writeups:
  • E2 Overdose
  • Jean Sibelius
  • 8:40 AM Eastern Daylight Savings Time.

    Went to the gym yesterday, worked my shoulders and back. Lot of hot girls there, typical for a Monday.

    Four hour peer review that was supposed to happen this morning got rescheduled for Thursday...not sure whether to be happy about it or not.

    I'm going to WWF Smackdown! tonight at the Nassau Coliseum. Should be very cool. I've been to a few house shows, but never a television taping before.

    Where to go for lunch, Wendy's or the bagel place? The eternal debate rages on.

    After a week, I'm still not sick of the Crimson Tide soundtrack.

    tuesday morning

    today, i have a new outlook on life. i feel more positive. i feel more focused. i rode my bike in to work today, but bending still hurts a but since my belly button is infected, so i'll hold off on going back to martial arts practice until thursday.

    my major projects at work are completed but i have been asked to look at a reporting script that no longer works since syslog in solaris 8 has changed format, so i have stuff to do. i doubt fixing that script will take much of my time, and so i don't feel too awful about procrastinating a bit on everything today.

    i wish it were the weekend again. i miss having the man around whenever i want him. i miss being able to roll over next to him, or calling out his name and having him appear by my side. i miss having him cook for me (yummy teriyaki salmon last weekend).

    i feel blessed to have found such a truly wonderful person with whom i share interests and attraction. sometimes i worry though that in some way i might not be showing him how much i appreciate how good he is to me.
    more later...

    << week | July 17, 2000 | July 18, 2000 | July 19, 2000 | week >>

    Everything's Best Users Snapshot

    
       #   Users                   XP   wa7   inc Level   l_XP l_wa7
        
       1   EDB                  20017     1     0     1  20017     1
       2   Pseudo_Intellectual  19300   142   110    11  19190   147
       3   DMan                 17818   161   176     9  17642   159
       4   dem bones            15654   107    53    11  15601   116
       5   Segnbora-t           12576   103   125    10  12451    99
       6   Saige                12457   101   132    10  12325    96
       7   sensei               10011   125   147     7   9864   121
       8   dannye                9865   115    90     9   9775   119
       9   pukesick              9496    10     7    10   9489    11
      10   tregoweth             9446   107   124    10   9322   104
      11   Deborah909            8694    42    41    10   8653    42
      12   ideath                8503    97    77     8   8426   100
      13   Lometa                8175    78    77     9   8098    78
      14   N-Wing                8012    15    13     9   7999    15
      15 * yossarian             7847    54    52     9   7795    54
      16 - Jet-Poop              7838    24    17     9   7821    25
      17 - knifegirl             7822    45     4     9   7818    52
      18   Tem42                 7759    72    78     8   7681    71
      19   JeffMagnus            7654    59     7    10   7647    68
      20   /dev/joe              7594    37     1     8   7593    43
        
      21   jessicapierce         7554    -9    47    10   7507   -18
      22 * moJoe                 7178    67    28     9   7150    74
      23 - pingouin              7171    25    17     9   7154    26
      24   bozon                 7101   107     8     9   7093   124
      25   ModernAngel           7012    38    95     9   6917    29
      26   General Wesc          6807    26    15     9   6792    28
      27   hoopy_frood           6656    38     9     8   6647    43
      28   Sylvar                6273    73    40     7   6233    78
      29   juliet                6113    73    23     9   6090    81
      30   novalis               6043    13     2     9   6041    15
      31   Templeton             5800    80    70     6   5730    82
      32   hamster bong          5799    85    77     6   5722    86
      33   Uberfetus             5543    33    23     6   5520    35
      34   alex.tan              5428    22     1     7   5427    26
      35   sabre23t              5365    56    22     7   5343    62
      36   bitter_engineer       5219    48     3     8   5216    55
      37   RockLobster           5042     8     1     9   5041     9
      38   nine9                 5019    11     2     9   5017    13
      39   yam                   4981     9     8     7   4973     9
      40   wharfinger            4957    63    54     6   4903    64
      41   kessenich             4749    35    45     9   4704    33
      42   ariels                4668    25     6     8   4662    28
      43   Sarcasmo              4417     4     7     8   4410     3
      44 * Lord Brawl            4348    52   103     8   4245    44
      45 * CaptainSpam           4332    39   105     9   4227    28
      46 - knarph                4328    14     6     9   4322    15
      47   Orange Julius         4294    52   103     7   4191    43
      48   Dis                   4257    69   100     6   4157    64
      49   themusic              4140    30    29     8   4111    30
      50   hatless               4104    42     9     8   4095    48
      51   mat catastrophe       3940    72    72     7   3868    72
       *   EBU #51               3940    28    72     *   3868    21
     

    Server time: 15:15 Tue Jul 18 2000 UTC, corrected since June 29, 2000

    * = users rising up in the EBU; - = users falling down in the EBU
    l_ = last (previous) value; inc = increase in stats value
    wa7 = ((stats + (6 * l_wa7))/7) = weighted average with denominator 7

    sabre23t: Random Nodes

    sabre23t: Nodes to node

    Yesterday | Dizzy->Day_Logs() | Tomorrow


    18:10 BST

    Segnbora-t sent me a Postcard! I wonder if my neighbour heard my mad cackles of delight? This, of course, means that I shall buy some postcards and embark on a sending spree (heh, sending spree, geddit?) So, Segnbora-t is the crunchiest, bestest, most mellifluous noder in the world! (However, on looking at her homenode, she says "no nodes about postcards"... I think this doesn't count, as it's in my daylog. :) In fact, I may have to take a day trip somewhere nice just to get good postcards, but where shall I go?

    I upgraded a customer's software today. This involved a trip to London, then a stop-start journey through the centre of London via Taxi. For some reason unknown to me, I had 5 spectators for the difficult task of putting a CD in a drive and clicking an icon - all of them from my company. They were probably either bored or after a free lunch (Yes, I know, there's no such thing)

    The train there was uneventful: I alternated between reading The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People and staring out the window. Mental Note: go for a ride on the London Eye During the train ride home, my new Project Leader (a real Alpha Geek) had fizzy water spilt all over him by a woman - but I must be maturing; I didn't find it that funny. (Normally I would have erupted in fits of giggles)

    Some ice broke between my Project Leader and I. We were discussing ex-colleagues and he told me that he didn't understand people that were just in it for the money! He also agreed that I should be more development than support focussed. (Which is a major victory - I would one day like to write some code of my own) I was proactive for the first time in ages: I drew a special chart for the version numbers of our software upgrade. /me is a good little corporate monkey!

    After upgrading the software successfully we had an expensive pub lunch - I had the piss taken because I ordered an Orange Juice with Soda Water for my drink. The 2 managers present decided to walk whilst waiting for a Taxi - the result of which meant that I walked for maybe a mile and a half In my smart, but uncomfortable shoes. So my feet hurt like hell.

    No Anonymous phonecalls today, yet.

    Its Tuesday in my world and Tuesday means boyfriend day. My boyfriend usually comes over to my apartment on Tuesdays. So, I’ll probably be going out to dinner tonight with my boyfriend. If not out, then I’ll cook him something yummy. He always likes my cooking. Even when I know its sub-par, he’ll tell me its good. He’s so wonderful. :)

    I still didn’t sleep well for the nth time last night. I keep having weird dreams that I can’t remember when I wake up. I vaguely remember having one that involved a lot of indigo and sepia toned places. I wish I could remember more because it would probably be a clue to where I need to be mentally or something.

    I don’t feel as depressed today as I have for the last few days. I don’t know what has changed to make me feel this way, as the situation hasn’t changed. It’s weird, but I don’t think it would be good to overanalyze it. Maybe its just the little bonus of getting a postcard from Segnbora-t in my mailbox. I’m not sure. It was an unexpected surprise that made me grin.

    Still looking for a job. Anyone know of any companies in the Portland area looking for a desktop tech or website proofreader? If so, check my home node and email me if you want. Thanks in advance.

    Had a vendor fair at work today. I got to see some cool stuff up close and personal, plus I got a new squishy toy for my desk. It was a nice break from the tedious boring place that is my current job.

    I have an appointment at a health club tomorrow for a fitness evaluation. I’m going to talk with a personal trainer and get my body fat pinched so we can design a program to get me back into shape. I need to lose about 50 pounds or so IMHO. If not that much, then at least enough so I can wear all my shorts again. Ugh. Ah well... I guess it could be worse. At least the health club is free. That’s one small benefit of working for this company.

    Nodes That I Wrote Today That I Like Better Than You:
    Muslimgauze
    Flossie and the Unicorns
    omigod – I can’t believe this wasn’t noded yet! OMIGOD!
    gumball poetry
    she's probably not single

    CD’s I’ve Listened To Today:
    Flossie and the Unicorns – LMNOP
    MuslimgauzeAzad
    MuslimgauzeFakir Sind
    Various Artists – Real World records 10 out of 10 compilation
    Elliot SmithXO
    Front 242 - Tyranny For You
    Controlled Bleeding - Penetration

    Variety is the spice of life.

    Early to bed, late to rise. My assistant made me blush and laugh today. Flatmate's parakeet "Egg" gnawed me, hooking her little sharp beak under the cuticle of my thumb, because she hates to see anyone holding the other bird ("Pee Wee"). She doesn't like to be held, herself; I think she just perceives humans as some sort of threat to her cagemate. Fortunately, parakeets are too puny to pierce my tough human hide. The roach coach had my favorite (taylor ham, egg & cheese sandwich) for the first time in weeks. Found a little background material on the Gloranthan River of Cradles campaign.
    Dinner: egg noodles and tobasco in chicken broth. Camel Turkish Gold cigarettes undermine my non-cigarette-buying discipline; I am up to pack 8 for the year. On the upside, I'm all out of marijuana and have no urge to acquire more, and I haven't brought beer or cider home in well over a month.

    1:23 BST, tomorrow morning

    Firstly, a brief wibble about July 17, 2000. I didn't do much. I worked at the garage, then came home to my mother coming home from her holiday (visiting relatives), on which I did not accompany her due to the reality of work. So I spoke to her for the first time in a week.

    so?

    Now, today. No work on either front, so I could relax. Yeah, right; I had to get up (after about 6 hours of sleep) to go to Perth for a driving lesson, which was around 11:00. I drove to Perth which was okay, and the lesson was quite good. I think the instructor thought my town driving was quite good, and my maneuvers are somewhat improving, although I still can't "do" them yet. What I hate is how he always keeps picking me up for not doing mirror checks when I do them! I think some people have a problem with the concept of moving your eyes but not your head. So now in a driving lesson I make stupid big, obvious movements to satisfy his idiotic observations of me. Don't get me wrong, he's a good instructor, but that really annoys me, people telling me off for things I didn't do, or even more, telling me to do things I do do.

    Never Mind!

    After that, I just spent the rest of the day vegging out in front of the TV/PC, depending on the time and whether it was complete garbage which was on the box. Which meant I just mainly surfed the net, 'cause the TV was total and utter, unmitigated crap.

    Actually, I was really tired due to the non-full night's sleep I got last night, and the pitifully short night's sleep I got the night before. Which was, 3 hours, followed by me answering a phone call from my work where I had to pretend that I had not just gone to sleep a few hours before, followed by another 3 hours of sleep, followed by 8 hours at my other (garage) work. So at one point I lay and sat on my bed, in a sort of half-asleep, half-awake, tired daydreaming state. And then my mum came in and said something which jolted me back to tired old reality; I said I was thinking about going to sleep.

    I then promptly woke up to a more alert state, and spent four hours browsing the web/ IRC'ing/ reading Usenet. And I'm now writing this - I intend to go to bed and sleep afterwards. And on a more abstract sense, I intend to get back to writing up a day log per day, assuming I can think of something to talk about. I mean, either an account or something interesting or some musings on life that day seem a fine thing to write, and Everythingians seem interested enough...

    05:49 BST tomorrow morning

    Well, I finally got my act together and made Level 2. So far the largest portion of my nodes are day logs, because I enjoy writing them; that's interspersed with various other, factual, stuff. Interestingly, the more factual write-ups have lower reputations. Whether this is something to do with what everything now is, or the differing quality or interestingness of my write-ups, I am unsure.

    I've started writing lyrics nodes. Just now, for Iron Maiden, more specifically, I am noding lyrics to songs in their album, "The X-Factor", which is my favourite. I intend to keep this up for a while, at least.

    As the alarm sounded I thought how silly it was that I could have set the alarm wrong, it had only been 5 minutes since I'd fallen asleep, right? Yeah, right. I figured I could go on a few hours of sleep as I used to, why not? I'm still young. What I didn't realize is eight hours of pure torturous hell, going through repeatative motions that turn my brain into mush by 5 o'clock is harder when you're counting the minutes even closer because you're sleep deprived.

    The constant gossip of my co-workers didn't help any - as if I want to hear about their children getting circumsized or about the new, over priced nail polish they bought that weekend. It causes me to be ashamed of my gender, utterly embarrassed that this is the intellectual conversation of the day. I don't know how my sister can't understand my urges to smash people's heads into the concrete. That's me being nice.

    At least I can node from work now, I got my own computer.
    Another day of work. Having the full mobility of being able to move around the entire grocery department (Instead of being welded to the bottle return) makes it SO much easier to avoid customers. Yummy.

    These 1PM-9:30PM shifts don't allow me to do much interesting, however. Thus, my daylogs are getting kinda bland. Guess I'd better keep working on Various Meijer Terms. That'll make me feel better.

    Today has been fucked up. I can't even begin. Let's just say, the almost impossible happened. It's a good thing. A good thing when I have been dealing with a lot of bad things. This good think will be the start of a new path.

    I haven't eaten. It's not an issue though. That is actually the farthest thing from my mind. My boyfriend and I had a talk about what I want to do with my life. The feeling of "this is the start of the end" fell over me. I dunno. I really don't know.


    I am sitting here.. over-exhusted, because I am a fucking moron. I am looking at my hands shake. About 6 hours ago that would have upset me. Now.. I really don't give a fuck.

    My life is so fucked. Yet it isn't. I have people who care about me.. who love me.. I have no right to feel slightly lonely, and slightly removed. I have no right to feel bad. I mean.. the eating disorder. I am the one who starves myself. I am the one who takes dexedrine, for the purpose of not being able to eat. I brought that on myself.

    What's so horrid.. my love life. Which is a joke. The past well.. the always womanizing fucked up guy who has been jerking me around since i was 16, until quite recently. Even while he was married. While he talks to me about how one day we would be married.

    The present.. I don't know. I really don't know. Part of was tempted to just end it now. We aren't going the same places. One of us is going to have to sacrifice something very importent to make this work. I'm not willing to ask him to make it, although I don't know if I can.

    again.. another self-inflicted, selfish thing that creates unhappiness in my world. And I have the audacity to feel bad for myself.

    This is just the stuff I have control over. Yet still.. with all the things that mean the most to me, pulling me in every which direction.. where I feel like I just want to scream, or cry, or laugh.. i'm not sure.. I AM ONE OF THE LUCKY PEOPLE!@# I have a roof over my head.. I have food in my fridge, I just refuse to fucking eat it. The sad part is.. I realize what a spoiled, selfish, person I am being.. and I can't help but feel sad.. even when undeserved.

    Got up early for the weekly 7am meeting. It always feels like a waste of time going to them... I tend to just tune out while my boss jabbers into the speakerphone. But at least it means that I get to leave work an hour early.

    Last night was spent having a bake-off between me and her... our friends were the judge of who made a better meatloaf. Of course, I thought that I won, and she thought that she won. The friends were just as split:

    hers: too onion-y
    mine: too ketchup-y
    "But both of them are good!"

    After a heated round of Balderdash, we laid around on bed for a while, just talking. What a concept, talking in a relationship.

    Errp... I'm just being cynical about the previous one.

    She asked me to tell her an inspiring story for tomorrow. So, now that's my goal.. to remember something inspiring.

    So what's inspiring?

    ...

    ->When my mom hugged me out of pseudo-depression
    ->When two people realized that they loved each other... despite the loss.
    ->When my priest blessed a crippled man in front of the congregation.


    Grr.

    Thinking of the inspiring events in life is hard work.

    This was my dad's and stepmother's second wedding anniversary. I stopped by their house after work to give them the gifts I bought for them. I'd picked up some things at a store called "The Wooden Duck" (or some such name), including a really nice photo album with a wooden front cover and back cover. They really liked everything. My stepmother complimented me on my skill at finding the right gifts all the time. I don't know what the big deal is; all I do is pay attention to what they like. (Oh, and she finally got the CDs.)

    I couldn't find my watch. I looked all over the house before I left for work without luck. When I came home, I ransacked my living room for over an hour, but still couldn't find it. Just before I went to bed, I found it. In my bedroom, on my dresser. In plain sight. I felt like an ass.

    Woke up with Kira still alseep next to me. Even when it's a friend and not someone you're involved with, I think it's one of the wonderful things in this world. Sunk back into unconsciousness and dreamed I was talking to her while we were both asleep.

    When we both woke for real, we continued watching the end of The Young Ones tape. Kira had to see the "kill the hippie!" ending to one episode after I mentioned it. Strange British humor concluded, we took off. I once again failed to mention my disappearance - oops. We stopped at the late Senor Fish first. For some strange reason, they had changed the name to Senor Fresh, signifying the death of another monument of our childhood. On the other hand, they had Red Bull at the counter, which helped me wake up quite a bit. On the other hand, their portions sucked - their so-called "large" taco was about half the size of the old tacos. The fish taco still tasted great, despite their miniscule size. The nature of their staff seems to have changed a lot as well, since the original Mexican servers are gone and only the cooks have stayed. Not saying I mind having an attractive female college student take my order, but it still seems somehow wrong...

    We then headed off to UCLA to see a friend of Kira from Oberlin. Ben was apparently taking summer classes there in Korean and Japanese history - impressive. Kira warned me that he was somewhat quiet, and seemed to have a crush on her as well. No prob - I love shy people. So much fun to play with. UCLA certainly had an impressive number of good-looking Asian girls, one thing I've missed up in Oregon. College attitude abounded, and Kira had much fun with the drivers. We parked and vaulted down and over the railways to Ben's dorm room in must what be the graduate student living area during the regular academic season - swank for university living.

    If anything, Ben was shyer than I had expected. Not much body expression, didn't talk much unless talked too, whatever. I've acted worse when meeting new people, so I didn't give it much thought. I imagine his crush on Kira was another "I know you so I want to love you" situation, since he was glad to see her but not that glad. We talked for a while, but then Kira had to go back to Ventura to work at one of her jobs. Thing was, she was only going in for an hour, so we felt that was unfair and warranted drastic action. So I convinced her to lie and say she had car trouble. After much weeping, wailing, and bemoaning, she called and found out they had left a message at her house. They didn't need her to come in. I don't think this would ever become an after-school special - the moral's a little fuddled. With that reprieve under our wings, we hit the road.

    First we hit Rhino Records. Disappointingly small techno section, but they had a decent Digweed set from Global Undergound and The K&D Sessions by Kruder and Dorfmeister, which I've been listening to constantly since buying. Didn't have the Digweed set I wanted, but hey. They were the first CDs I had bought since using high-speed access at college. Ben had apparently spent all of his cash on CDs earlier, and Kira got a staff discount at her store, so I was the only one walking out of the store secure in the happiness of consumerism. We then went to 3rd Street in Santa Monica, a street set aside just for pedestrians. Interesting and varied group of people and stores. Unlike say Oldtown in Pasadena or Universal Citywalk *shudder*, there didn't seem to be cops or rent-a-cops moving everyone along they didn't like.

    We next dropped off at Midnight Special, a decent independent bookstore. Eclectic collection, knowledgably alternative employees, pocket editions of the Constitution and Declaration of Independence at the counter, and hugely tall bookshelves, and for once, they allowed the customers to use the ladders. Wee, I loved them instantly! I picked up Whit by Iain Banks, Foucalt's Pendulum by Emberto Eco, Strip Joint by Carol Lay, a collection of Story Minute strips, and seven miles a second by David Wojnarowicz and James Romberger. The employees actually complimented me for buying the last one, saying what a great piece of literature it is. Definitely one of the angriest scribes I've ever read.

    There was a sign saying All Pets Must Be Carried on the wall, and Kira made a crack asking if I wanted to be carried out, so I wapped her with my wallet. A rather short woman with some strange physical disability tried to push her way between us, telling me rather pointedly not to hit her. I explained it was only fair, Kira hit me a decent amount as well. Kira then demonstrated, not quite necessarily. It got her a glare from me, but the woman was assuaged, and actually started chatting with us jokingly. I think she thought we were going out.

    We took off with Ben in tow. I stopped at a henna stall first, since I wanted a small star on my right earlobe. On BMEzine there's an amazing picture of a woman with a blue star tattoo on her ear with a captive bead ring through it. I wanted to see what it could do for me. Not much, unfortunately - I peeled the henna off way too early, and the star was barely visible. Oops. Kira dropped Ben off at the luscious UCLA dorms, and we headed off home, since I had a short doctor's appointment. Unfortuntely, traffic around UCLA virtually stopped for minutes. We could see the police telling people to shove off and guiding traffic, but we couldn't tell why. Probably some celebrity or something. It delayed us so much we got stuck in rush hour traffic, and I missed the doctor's appointment. Kira was freaking out more than I was - very apologetic, anxious. I figured there wasn't much I could do, so a stoic response was best. Dropped by the office, but the doctor was already gone. Headed home to a lovely reception by my mother. Since I hadn't said good-bye last night and hadn't said I was going out in the morning, and she had got a phone call from the doctor asking where I was, she was less than happy. Only good point was the henna star, actually. When I first mentioned it, she thought it was a tattoo. I think coming home from college with my piercings shocked her, and she hasn't known what I'd do since. Guess I never discussed my interest in it before, and since I didn't take up her offer to pierce my ears (what homophobia really means).

    She forgave me though, and I headed off with Kira for dinner. Went to a nice Indian restaurant. Good food, and I haven't had such great service in a long time. The night had to end some time however. Kira headed off to Ventura, and I crashed at home. What enjoyable two days.

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